How to explain I need to be with my boys at Xmas?

[Rosella moggy]

With me it would depend on how close the relatives (i.e. how related) are, how often I go to see them and whether I liked them or not. Had very bad experience in the past putting myself out for an aunt a great deal over many years and it all went sour. It's something I wouldn't do again. Life's too short.

If you go to see them during the year I don't see why they should take offence at you not going at Christmas. I take the point that you don't have many rellies but, if you constantly give in, it will be expected of you every year. It's just bullying. Easier said than done I know but I would try and resist making an excuse and just say you prefer to stay at home for Christmas.

[Linda (Bengalbabe)]

Well I have the perfect reason not to go anywhere for more than a couple of hours, 11 stark raving bonker bengals need me 
(and of course the lovely Stitchy).

[lisa77]

My mum was a bit upset this year when I told her that I wont be driving anywhere ! I bet I still pop over at some point as my sis is making me feel bad ! I refuse to go anywhere else though.. it is secretly as I have Leo now !!!

[furballmom]

i know how you feel were still waiting for my mum in law to be to get the hint were not going this year.

[Susanne (urbantigers)]

I agree with inviting them to you, but book a hotel for lunch so that you don't have to do all the cooking 

[alisonandarchie]

As you get invited to their house every year how about inviting them to your house, you could say that you would like a chance to return their hospitality.

[Gill (sneakiefeline)]

I think its a bit cruel to tell them so close to Christmas cos of food and stuff, I would just be honest and say you have a family Christmas planned with the cats and therefore cannot come. They will get the hang of it eventually 

I dropped out of family Chrismas  many many years ago even before Kocka arrived and once she did she was my family and I wasnt gonna leave her.

[pappilon]

100% Agree with Sam, few days before Xmas ask OH to call and say you have a bad cold and you dont want them to catch it from you,so best is to stay home and pretend you are really disappointed ,becos you were looking forward to make up for last year , Its just a white lie, not to upset them

[Ellie]

Either that or you could accept and then come down with a nasty dose flu about a week before and cancel then  (I know it's a bit sneaky but needs must).

Just what I was thinking Sam   

[Sam (Fussy_Furball)]

Can you invite the relatives to yours?  If you say you have been invitied somewhere else they may just say "Oh ok how about coming on X date instead" then you are back to square one.

Either that or you could accept and then come down with a nasty dose flu about a week before and cancel then  (I know it's a bit sneaky but needs must).

[puddypaws]

I know it's an outright lie, but I once told some relatives that the cat was on medication which had to be givenat set times.  It makes me sound awful but it was never pleasant going to see them.

[swampmaxmum]

I need peep's advice. My relatives live quite far from here, as in it takes a whole day to go and see them and come back (early am to late eve). They know that I am bonkers about my boys and that they are old and need care and I hate leaving them. However they take huge offence if I don't go there at Xmas, which I don't want to do (and know the invitation's going to arrive any time). Last year I told the truth and said Swampy was too ill and I'm sorry but I'm not comfortable leaving him all day and they were upset and took it personally (they have a cat, which they care about and for, but it's 'a cat'). OH thinks we can't always rebuff the relatives, (even if some of them are best avoided lol) as we don't have much family. Sooooo - do I make up an excuse that we've been invited elsewhere?!