How to read the story .............
TRE = Treacle talking TOF = Toffee talking.
TOF; last night in between my dad snoring on my left and treacle snoring on my right strange things stared to happen in my humans bedroom
no , I don't mean those sorts of things , my mum and dad are at least 100 years old by now and almost falling apart or that's what dad's always saying to mum . Anyhow he's how it went .
TRE; my turn , my turn ..........well I was laying there just admiring how clean my mums nose was on the inside for a human when all of a sudden dad gets out of bed ..............oooooh me thinks to myself going downstairs chance of fish here bro , so we both sat up.
TOF; no, I sat up before you as I saw it all happen the nearest
TRE: shut up you just because your one and a half minutes older than me you think you know everything , so go on what did he first do then
TOF: well he struggled up from the bed in his underpants ....strange that that humans wear there fur in bed
as he stood unright facing the curtains he suddenly started to dance
TRE: I thought he had some of those ants that you sat on in the garden
in his pants and was about to come to his rescue when he then started to sing ...........
TRE: mum said later that morning when she was talking to dad about his strange 4 am behaviour that doing 'line dancing ' in ones underpants was most amusing for all three of us to watch at that time .
TOF: my turn bro.....he sort of slapped his bum and danced from one leg to the other saying strange words like 'ho and docy doe' and seemed to be having a wonderful time , I wanted to join in but mum who was sitting with us watching in amazment stopped me from assisting dad by climbing up his pants with my claws.......spoil sport
so he then went on about 'poo'
TRE: now tell them properly or they will think your perverted or gone mad as well .
TOFF: some weeks ago mum who got fed up with dads snoring discovered that when he was on his back his mouth fell open ........very interesting to see just what is in there
and maybe pop a cat biscuit or two in just in case he gets hungry , trouble is dad seems to dilike the flavour of them in 2 am in the morning
SO...................mum came up with the idea of wedging dads mouth shut with something under his chin
and found one of the grandchildren's soft toys just the right size , hence the 'poo' its a 'winnie the poo' soft teddy bear about 5-6 inches high.
TRE: tell them ....tell them what happened next .
TOF: well dad started shouting where's my poo at the top of his voice and feeling about the bed which made us all look at each other as it was now apparent that dad was sound asleep , so mum asked dad what was he doing and he said ...............
TRE: 'I'm asleep in bed you daft thing what do you think I'm doing '
mum at this point started to laugh loudly and well , we just sat and watched as mum whacked dad with his 'poo' around the bum , which by now had stopped dancing, that's dads bum not poo by the way
TOF; shame that as he was getting into the swing of it and might of started to waltz or tango after line dancing , but by now mum had beaten dad into a sort of , well almost , semi awake state and he stopped and looked around the bed ............seeing us three sitting watching him and asked US
............... what we were doing !!!!!!!
TRE: you thought he was awake by then ........
.TOF: no I didn't I could see he was still strange
TRE: so out of the blue dad then shouts .....'were's my poo , I want my poo.............
poo come on poo come to daddy ............
dady wants to give you nice big hugs ..............
to which mum replied something I cannot write here .
TRE: dad then got into bed and went quiet after mum had jammed poo under his chin .
Both the boys ; So do you think our humans are crazy ? or are your humans as strange as ours , do spill the beans on what they get up to when they think your not watching , errrrrrrrrrrr nice things not the 'you know what sort ' by the way .
TOF: when mum told dad what he had been up to in the night he sat and laughed so much he leaked water from his face ..............ooooooooooooohhhhhhhhhhhhh salty TRE: and he said he couldn't have done all that without waking up .
but as mum said 'ask the boys, they sat and watched you singing and dancing and asking for your poo as well , then he went all sort of pink in the face , poor man . I must remember to rub my fishy face on his nose tonight when he's alseep to see if I can get him to dance again for us , it really was so entertaining .
TREACLE &
TOFFEE your furry reporters from the household of Lady magic and family .
