Cat Wars

[Steff - Petsearch Bedford HQ]

Originally had just had Bourneville and then Marble joined as his playmate. She has always been nervous and reserved especially in comparison to Bourne cos he is sooooo friendly. For the most part they got on with just the odd spat. Then in Jan this year Soap joined us (not by choice, we rescued her from being kept in someones pantry cupboard). She is crazy and annoys Marble but what made it worse was Bourne joining in on annoying Marble!!! If you got a third cat you couldn't guarantee that wouldn't happen (or that it would of course).

I'm now in a difficult situation because Marble is weeing everywhere because of the stress. We have stuck with Feliway and also tried a "happy drug" from the vets which seems to be working already. Do you want to give it a go also? I am also going to be speaking to a cat mad VN from my vets for some behavioural tips and if it carries on will be speaking to a full on animal behavourist.

I may need to see a human therapist due to the stress of it all!!!

[Teresa Pawcats]

From the few vids I have had time to watch it looks to me as if she just needs her confidence boosting and really wants to be involved. I would go down the relax and play route rather than another addition.

[clarenmax]

Can't add anything meaningful as I have no experience, just wanted to add to say I hope you find a way to sort things out between them, as it must be confusing for them, and indeed hard for you both to watch 

[Angiew]

If you get another cat then there is a choice for them between human or furry playmate.
It may make things better or worse - who knows.

As a last resort put them both in a carrier, drive them round for 30 mins, back home lots of fuss and treats and see if that helps.

Have they both been together at the vets since?

(totally my own babble!)

[princessmaizie]

Sorry can't seem to get the hang of quoting other posts!

It must be a horrible situation for you to be in. Another cat might improve things or make them loads worse, it does seem like a big risk! Effie might get some peace and love it if Ella had a friend to play with, it does sound like she'd be happiest if she could keep herself to herself. On the other hand she might see the newbie as a further threat!

Sending  for all of you. I hope you can work it out!

[princessmaizie]

That's so sad, poor Ella! It must be so upsetting for you to watch.

Have you thought about getting another sociable cat for Ella to be friends with? Effie might be happier as well with some peace to do her own thing. I know this might not be practical for you but it's all I can think of! Good luck! 

[/b]

That must be a major concern! How does Effie react when Ella is playing with Silver? Does she try and join in? Or does she seem happy alone? It would be fab if we could read their minds wouldn't it!!

Yes all the time! Ella would love another cat to curl up with , to clean and to play with. However how would Effie cope! I fear she may go further menatlist!

[princessmaizie]

That's so sad, poor Ella! It must be so upsetting for you to watch.

Have you thought about getting another sociable cat for Ella to be friends with? Effie might be happier as well with some peace to do her own thing. I know this might not be practical for you but it's all I can think of! Good luck! 

[jezebel]

Oh dear!

I read a similar story recently in a book called Psycho Kitty. Two cats lived together happily until one night when Cat 1 got frightened by a racoon outside (this was in the US!) and started yelling at it through the screendoor, Cat 2 walked in and Cat 1 went for him.  End of harmony! The author called it redirected aggression, and the owner had to do a lot of hard work - separating the cats initially and then getting them in the same room but playing with them separately (at the same time - told you it was hard work!). But I think the aggression was far worse in their case.

I know it's not exactly the same situation with Ella and Effie, but it could be that Effie associates the pain and fear of the accident with Ella, even though it wasn't Ella's fault.

Not sure what to suggest to be honest. How is Effie with you and other humans?

Could you get them both in the same room but playing with you? Sounds Effie needs to learn how to relax with Ella again.

My two are extremes of one another too so I know how frustrating it is!

[Guest]

Despite them being together since kittens, things are not good between Ella and Effie.

It started a few months ago when Effie injured her leg. It was the early hours of a Sunday morning and I has just put some fresh water down for them and then started to stroke them and make a fuss to say goodnight. Then suddenly they both walked to the top of the stars, a bit panicked as they had heard something outside (probably a fox). Ella went downstairs to investigate and Effie came to me a bit nervous. Suddenly Ella came bounding up the stairs and Effie freaked. She ran to the corner, leapt up in the air, hit the handle of the window, as she came down she smacked herself on window sill and hit the litter shacks and the floor. she started limping but was calm. (I was hysterical and Sean was the same when I called for him). Effie started to be very hissy, which at first we though it was because she was injured.

Anyway the next day we took her to the emergency yet, they said she was bruised and gave her some pain relief. That must be six/eight months ago and Effie  has never stopped hissing with Ella and can sometimes go for her.

The problem is Ella is the most social cat, she loves the company of other cats - she plays happily with another cat Silver who lives near us. The two of them roll around the garden and ella will sit and wait for Silver to "come out to play". She wants to cuddle up to Effie at night and clean and nuzzle her. Effie is NOT interested in Ella or Silver and will literally growl.

Sometimes Effie will put her chin out to be cleaned, 2 minutes after she attacks Ella. Ella is now nervous when she walks past Effie as she never knows how she will react. I just watched them out in the garden and everywhere Effie goes, Ella follows and then gets attacked. It is so sad as they have been together so long and it is only since Effie was injured

Effie loves human company and will happily go to anyone that is in the room (Ella is less keen on humans and is not a lapcat at all, She hardly notices Sean and only pays attention to me!)

Feliway had no effect whatsoever and Effie is getting worse and I find it upsetting. She obviously hates other cats, whereas Ella is craving another cat to play with.   They are such extremes of one another and it is worrying me. I love them both so much!