Does anyone ever feel frustrated with their cats

[nickynoo93]

I'm still in the new mummy stage with mine, just under a year of having them.  Charlie is on his terms, but he does snuggle up at night, on the edge of the bed no matter how many inches there is spare. I nearly squished him the other day he was tucked up beside me.
He won't leave me alone after a shower  or bath though.
I talk to Charlie a lot, he loves a good chat. He answers back everytime, think he is saying 'shut up mum'!!

Poppy lurvvvvvvvvvvvvvves her cuddles pretty much all the time, especially  when I'm on the laptop. She gets right up over My shoulder or across My chest under My chins. She won't be shut out of the bathroom! Hasn't jumped in yet though.

I do wonder how she will take to new addition/s when we finally get settled.

Nicky x

[Kirst]

Beavis is very high maintenance - he can be very clingy and will often miaow for hours for no reason

[Susanne (urbantigers)]

I am trying to ignore Jaffa a bit although it is hard.  I still talk to him of course and fuss him but I realised that every time he whined I answered back e.g. "what's up Jaf?" and whenever he climbed on my knee I would stroke and kiss him.  Now if he's had a fair bit of fuss and still climbs on my knee asking for attention I will let him sit there but don't stroke him or talk to him to try and descourage him from thinking he can have cuddles whenever he wants.

[Den]

Den, how do you react when he's pestering you?  Do you respond?  with either fuss or by talking to him?

I think I probably do talk to him far too much to be honest  I don't really stroke him a great deal when he's on me. His favourite thing is to have a good ol' chin rub, and once you start he never really wants you to stop. For that reason I don't do it too often. So when he plonks himself on me he usually get's a "noooo not now, off you get" followed by a "Memps/Memphy!" The more I ignore him the more tendency he has to lie right up in my face, which is not something I like as it's really quite creepy. When I take him off of me he just comes right back, I've even tried tipping him off of me so he jumps to the ground and he still comes back.  His fuss from me is when I scoop him up from the floor and do very torturous things to him 

I will admit though that I do talk to him quite a lot - he get's a good morning, good bye, hello plus random chatter. He talks back, which is really cute  Plus he does get the conversation several times a day that I would appreciate it if he didn't sit on me all the time or get in my way. Also I ask him to get out of my way quite freaquently 

He does get a "hello" when I come in and a "good bye, be good" when I leave.

I'm going to try and see if I can ignore him to see if it helps. I do feel really guilty, but unfortunately I'm not the sort of person who can sit for great lengths of time in the same place, let alone position. I'm a very fidgety person by nature and I don't think I can change that. Plus I like my space. I've got no problems if it's a few times a day just not all the time.

Right now he's doing his level best to get on my lap (just because I'm sat cross legged - that's because I'm comfy) yet as soon as I've had a quick browse on purrs and facebook I'll be off the comp so it's not the right time for him.

[Guest]

Ella always has a cuddle before bed. effie isn't a lapcat but demands to be stroked so she will tap you or put her paw on your hand so you get the idea she needs stroking!!

[Susanne (urbantigers)]

When I get in from work I fuss them for a bit and put my stuff away and then I feed them.  When I get around to sitting down somewhere, Jaffa is always on my lap and it can be really frustrating as at that time of day I tend to not be able to sit down for long but he won't let me get up!  He wants me to stroke him and kiss him and he purrs his little head off, licks my arms and face etc.  Once he's had an hour or two of attention he seems happier to go off and sleep on top of the tv but later on in the evening he'll be back and all over me.   I love him to bits and like his attention a lot of the time but there are times when I just feel like he's invading my personal space and wish he'd back off!  Den, how do you react when he's pestering you?  Do you respond?  with either fuss or by talking to him?  Might be worth trying to ignore him a bit (and then give him attention when he's not demanding it - if such a time ever happens!) to get him used to the fact that climbing on you and getting too close doesn't reward him.  Just trying to deter him a little bit.

[JackSpratt]

Den, of course! Much as you love your furry family they can still be hard work. 

[Philip]

I Love my Delphi to bits and I know she has been through a lot.

But she still toilets (no 2) on my carpet at times and sometimes I feel frustration towards her because of it.

Ragdolls being the way they are crave human company, so I allways have a companion.

I understand you wanting a bit of your "own time". It doesn't mean you don't love them though. 

[Guest]

I probably would feel frustration but the cat kray twins have already driven me to distraction!!

I do understand it as ella and effie would get me to buy a baby harness and would sit in it if I allowed. I have just accepted that is their way now!!

[Shiroi-Neko]

Ai Chan is more of a user, she never shows any over the top, in your face attention seeking.
When it's feeding time she likes to Meows & strech her paws up to my legs, while I am in the kitchen. And stick her claws in my thighs  , I don't know if she dose this because she is deaf. I get this if I don't serve her straight a way,

[Den]

but we shouldn't complain, you really miss it when it's gone  

This is why I do feel incredibly guilty all the time. I know I would hate it if he weren't to do it and when I'm away I do miss him and feel very 'lost'. So when it's gone to never come back I can see how I'd miss it terribly and wish it back  Trouble is, he's only just turned 3 so I hopefully have a looooooooooot more of it to come which make me feel very overwhelmed.

I'm just feeling very invaded by him. I've only just come home and he's already tried to sit on my lap (boy did he try!!) now he's sat to my immediate right just staring at me - with both of his feet on my blackberry  and waiting for an opportunity to sit on me. Whereas Molly, bless her is off doing her own thing.

I know it's not something I should moan about it, but I can't help feeling the way I am.

Lucifers quite clingy (sitting on my belly/knees while im IN the bath)

OMG no way!  I hope I don't have that to come 

Thank you everyone. I have been feeling so boxed him by him, but also sooooooooooo guilty for pushing him away so much.

[Janeyk]

I've had this with a few cats Den.  Squeaky was always pestering me, all the time for fuss, fuss and more fuss.  Then when we adopted Smokey and Timmy the pair of them were climbing on me at once all the time, and  had 1 on 1 knee and 1 on the other it gets a bit hot too especially in the summer Timmy would also do this slow movement with his tail I can't remember now exactly but it had to be touching me sort of wrapped round my arm or something bless him but it was irritating and he was always there under my feet like my shadow  Byron was exactly the same she would even lay on my face in bed if I'd let her and would sit at the side of the bath and often try to get in! but we shouldn't complain, you really miss it when it's gone  

[snarf]

Giles was horribly overclingy- i swear his eyes NEVER left you and i got the feeling hed stare waiting at the door after i left so he wouldnt miss a second.  i understand the feeling of pressure and need ing some space!

Lucifers quite clingy (sitting on my belly/knees while im IN the bath) still but has improved my miles since the arrival of sparecat. he is usually in the same room as me, and both escort me to bed but they dont follow me, they just sort of meander in after a while looking bored. and i am actually allowed to use the bathroom without an attendant now   they still both have days where they just cant understand that all this paperwork i am reading, highlighting and slowly sorting into distinct piles is not an exciting new toy-cum-bed and that surprisingly  lying across my wrists doesnt mean your allowing me to keep my hands free.

[Den]

Thanks Susanne 

I just remembered now that also a large part of the frustration is that because he's so close he is ALWAYS in the way. I made a phone call but there was no answer so I went to put the handset down before the call went to answerphone. But there was Memphis in between me and the phone. I'm constantly having to nudge him out of the way. I can't walk freely because he's always at my feet, and the WORST part of it is when in front he will walk sooooooooooooooo slowly. If I'm in a hurry to get to the door or save something from burning in the oven or something I get slowed right down by him. It's not that it happens sometimes, it's that it will happen every time. He's like a living breathing fire hazard 

Memphis definitely does what Jaffa does with the seats.

would even watch me in the shower

I get that all the time, it's really starting to freak me out now.

[Feline Costumier]

Dave used to be like that, before we spent 6 months apart. He could literally not be close enough to me at all times, would even watch me in the shower and lick my legs when I got out.

Thankfully this has calmed down a lot. In a lot of ways I miss some of the traits he had before going to a fosterer for a period but when I think about how suffocating it can feel I am quite relieved!

Chilli can drive me potty because when she decides she wants attention she is very very persistent and lying next to me will not do, she has to be as close to my face as possible and proceeds to dribble all over me

BUT, by far the times when I get most frustrated is at the weekend when Dave insists I have to get up and feed him and will go to great lengths to make a nuisance of himself and be naughty. There are times I could happily throttle him if I didn't have to look at the cute furry face to do it!

[Susanne (urbantigers)]

Oh yes - I get that with Jaffa.  I love him to bits but sometimes he loves me too much!  He doesn't sound as bad as Memphis in terms of following me around, but for a substantial part of the evening he wants to be with me and will just plonk himself on top of me.  Or he will come and sit beside me on the sofa and despite the fact that there is loads of room beside me (I usually sit in the middle of a 3 seater sofa), he will squash himself up against me so that he's more on me than beside me.  I've successfully managed to deter him from lying on me at night by giving him his own hot water bottle with a fluffy cover -he lies on that at night instead of on me    If he doesn't feel he's getting enough attention he'll start whining for it.  I think Jaffa is genuinely an over dependent cat and I have encouraged this over the past few years since Magpie died - intially he was grieving so I gave him extra attention, then I got Mosi so I gave him extra attention to make him feel he wasn't being pushed out.  He's always had a clingy nature though.  I am consciously trying to withdraw my attention from him a bit now so if he sits virtually on top of me I try to resist stroking him and talking to him all the time.

[Den]

Having a bit of a  time at the moment.

I like having my own space at times, Memphis likes sharing my space at all times. That is the problem. Everywhere I go he's there, if I sit down he has to sit on me or right next to me. If I lie in bed just relaxing he just appears EVERY SINGLE time and lies on me. Mostly, he does it so he's nose to nose and it just makes me sooooooooooo uncomfortable. So I pick up up and move him next to me, then he gets up and just plops himself back on me. I know some people would love that as they never get it with their own cats, but for me it's just toooooooooooooo much. Especially when I get the sad, pathetic look of 'don't you love me any more'. Where ever I go he just has to be there. I decided to have a nice relaxing bath yesterday and chose to have it on my own so I shut the door on him. About 5 minutes in all I could hear was screaming, yowling, crying and him trying to break down the door 

I loves him a lot, but sometimes I just wish he'd give me some 'me' time and he can have some 'him' time. If I'm home all day he will literally not leave my side for the entire there. His level of clinginess is just so frustratingly overwhelming for me.

I don't have this feeling with .. in fact I've never had this feeling with any of my pets. They have always had their own space. Molly is always nearby, but will do her own thing and isn't constantly staring at me  I believe Memphis is the only living creature that I've ever threatened with a restraining order (10 ft or further - in hindsight I might be able to cope with a minimum distance of 5ft)

I'm not sure whether it's due to the fact he was hand reared from 3 weeks old and never really knew his mum. He just won't leave me alone 

So to make me feel a little better  does anyone else ever feel frustrated by their cats, or am I just being really selfish