Topic: Memphis is stressing me out at the moment (Read 4841 times)

Liz · « **Reply #27 on:** September 22, 2009, 08:43:50 AM »

Den have to say that we have Sunny so Sky wouldn't be left on his own what with Jazz being 15 and having defied medical opinion so far Sky couldn't do only dog he is devoted to Jazz and just about loves his little brother who is now bigger than him!

They will reach a status quo ours have now learnt who they can practice rounding up on and who they can't, BC's are high energy but our pair do tire each other out - they are both in a run all day as well and get to sleep in peace or trash the place dependant on how they are feeling beleive me when i say some mornings at 06.45am I could do without the half hour of ball play - but it does tire them just tad!

Our lot are wonderful fun but can be littles Sods to and yes although hard work I wouldn't swap them for the world!

Den · « **Reply #26 on:** September 21, 2009, 22:13:24 PM »

Liz, I worked it out like this ... Molly needs a dog friend to gang up on Memphis the bully. Then Memphs will need a cat friend to gang up on the dogs. Then the dogs will need another to gang up on the cats, then the cats will need another ....

And I'll need a holiday

Oh how I'd love to come up and see your lot, they sound wonderful and a lot of fun .. If hard work.

alisonandarchie · « **Reply #25 on:** September 21, 2009, 22:09:59 PM »

Archie and Parki told me they will be round to play with Memphis's toys

Den · « **Reply #24 on:** September 21, 2009, 22:08:28 PM »

Thanks MM.

I'll just have to think of other mental games to play as him going out isn't going to be an option. I have to say though he appears perfectly contented in every way and isnt displaying any other abnormal behaviours apart from beating Molly up recently.

My gut instinct says he isn't wanting more mental stimulation - I have a high drive collie so mental games are a daily occurance. Memphis is just acting more brat like than anything .... But I'm going to give him extra activities and see if it makes a difference. He's too smart for his own good sometimes.

At the moment he's really sleepy and overtired as he missed his earlier nap.

Liz · « **Reply #23 on:** September 21, 2009, 22:01:11 PM »

The Clan cats now feel deprived in the toy dept!

We have as many indoor as outdoor and our mob are on there own from 7.15am till 6pm when we get in from work = perhaps Memphis needs a cat pal to gang up on the dog!

They will reach a status quo ours have despite having to train 2 puppies in 2 years bit of a shock for our lot as Breeze was 8 when he joined us with jazz from my parents and he had arthritus so never played with the cats he was also deaf so he made great stalking material - they think Jazz is a cat

They will calm down but me thinks sometimes they do it to wind up the parents I know ours do - when Panther impales his claws in Sunny's head to give him a wash and poor Sunny has stunned written all over his face or the ones who walk under the dogs, we also have the meercat head rubbing doggie cats to we also have the ones who give chase across the garden does cause qquite a stir as ours tend to move in mini packs!

Millys Mum · « **Reply #22 on:** September 21, 2009, 21:47:21 PM »

Hes physically as active as an outdoor cat but they get mental stimulation that toys dont provide from being outdoors, im not anti indoor (

) but just suggesting why he could be doing it. Maybe now hes growing up he wants more then toys can provide, him mastering the dog toy certainly shows intellect

Bazsmum · « **Reply #21 on:** September 21, 2009, 20:29:27 PM »

Poor deprived Memphy!

Methinks he wants to be a dog....have you tried a rubber chicken?

Den · « **Reply #20 on:** September 21, 2009, 20:18:21 PM »

I just went around counting up what he's got for entertainment ..

4 x scratching posts of different types and sizes
4 x feathers on a stick
2 x squirrels on springs activity things
1 x cat-it
1 x Da bird
1x Da mouse
1 x feather attachment
13 x balls of varying types
15 x straws
4 x large vibrating mouses
15 x mouses of varying types
7 x pom poms
14 x scrunched up lottery tickets
1 x catnip banana
1 x yeowww fish
1 x wiggly wagger
2 x bottle tops
1 x kong wubba
1 x lion
1 x tweeting robin
1 x catnip bone

He plays with all of them and which one depends on his mood. We also play find the treat, plus he plays with Mollys Nina Ottosson toy http://www.companyofanimals.co.uk/nina-ottosson-toys.php - he's mastered the hard setting.

He's nearly always got company and someone to play with. If I try to play and he doesn't want to then he doesn't. If he wants to play he basically asks. Twice a day he sits on the window for a few minutes just to have a nosey and thats about it really.

Den · « **Reply #19 on:** September 21, 2009, 19:21:50 PM »

Quote from: Millys Mum on September 21, 2009, 19:11:02 PM

You say it isnt boredom but to me it sounds like hes making some amusement for himself, what better then to bully something twice your size!

It's definitely not boredom as he will do it anytime of the day. He could wake up and start 5 seconds later. He's got plenty of toys to keep him occupied, which he does play with. He goes on spider/moth hunts. He may be an indoor cat but I make sure he's occupied somehow. If he's dying to play with someone then he always brings me a toy and we play together. He's probably just as active as any outdoor cat - just in a different way.

Millys Mum · « **Reply #18 on:** September 21, 2009, 19:11:02 PM »

You say it isnt boredom but to me it sounds like hes making some amusement for himself, what better then to bully something twice your size!

Tiggy's Mum · « **Reply #17 on:** September 21, 2009, 15:19:14 PM »

Quote from: Den on September 21, 2009, 14:55:47 PM

Eeeeps. I don't need him more confident, I need the complete opposite. I keep threatening the pair of them that if they don't start behaving then I'm going to get them a puppy who can beat the pair of them up Ssshhhh, don't tell them that it's an empty threat (for the time being ).

Thanks so much Helen, at least I know it isn't just him .... maybe we should get all the 2 year olds and bang their heads together I think if Molly was his size then what you describe going on between Lu and Riley with the body slamming sounds about right here. He also has his Lion taking down a Gazelle impression down to a tee.

Who's winning between Lu and the Freezer Monster?

Oh we have the lion/gazelle chases and take downs here too

Lu is the undisputed featherweight champion of the freezer monster contest.... when the Feliway is plugged in

It's amazing stuff - I'd go so far as to say life changing for him as he really was super skittish to the point he was frightened of going in the kitchen and even walking past the kitchen. The feliway allows him to be himself and his cheeky little personality shines through - the difference in him is amazing, he's so much more relaxed and confident

Den · « **Reply #16 on:** September 21, 2009, 15:02:35 PM »

Quote from: Liz on September 21, 2009, 14:49:30 PM

I have been known to use a water psitol to!

More piccies of the doggies to come as my baby Sunny Bunnikins all 25kgs of him will be 1 on Wednesday and minus boy bits on Friday!

OMG, he got big!!! And I can't believe he's a year old already!!! Where does the time go.

I had thought about using a water pistol, but Memphy loves water, and if I get my aim wrong Molly will hate me forever and ever. She's already giving me that look of "Why'd you have to bring that smelly thing here, you've had your fun now. I promise to be a good dog and I'm so sorry for being a horrible puppy. What did I ever do to deserve this" She could win an Oscar for her woe is me performance.

They love each other really though.

Den · « **Reply #15 on:** September 21, 2009, 14:55:47 PM »

Eeeeps. I don't need him more confident, I need the complete opposite. I keep threatening the pair of them that if they don't start behaving then I'm going to get them a puppy who can beat the pair of them up

Ssshhhh, don't tell them that it's an empty threat (for the time being

).

Thanks so much Helen, at least I know it isn't just him .... maybe we should get all the 2 year olds and bang their heads together

I think if Molly was his size then what you describe going on between Lu and Riley with the body slamming sounds about right here. He also has his Lion taking down a Gazelle impression down to a tee.

Who's winning between Lu and the Freezer Monster?

Liz · « **Reply #14 on:** September 21, 2009, 14:49:30 PM »

I have been known to use a water psitol to!

More piccies of the doggies to come as my baby Sunny Bunnikins all 25kgs of him will be 1 on Wednesday and minus boy bits on Friday!

The Zylkene does work on the cats and our doggies both have feral best friends and after using Zylkene for about a month we reached happy status and stopped but use it on new feral incommers as most have't seen big doggies that close up!

Tiggy's Mum · « **Reply #13 on:** September 21, 2009, 14:40:14 PM »

I think it's just his age Den, I've read that most cats mature around this age so he is probably having a power struggle with Molly trying to show her he is boss.

Riley and Lu love each other to bits but lately I've noticed they're more spiteful to each other (they're 2 1/2 now) - no real fighting but they'll clonk each other round the head, body slam each other into walls etc

I'm 100% certain this is play fighting as there's no teeth or claws but it has definitely intesnified over the last few months as they have matured.

I use Feliway for a different reason (Lu's skittishness, around the kitchen in particular, after his freezer monster fright) but if anything it makes him super confident and he's more likely to bosh Riley round the head than pre-Feliway so it might be counter-productive in Memphis' case!

Den · « **Reply #12 on:** September 21, 2009, 14:08:59 PM »

Thank you so much.

Liz, Molly has a crate and given half the chance Memphis wiggles his way into it like your ferals. Last week I was cooking dinner and ended up removing him 3 times, each time I kicked him out and as soon as my back was turned he was straight back in there. Molly has given me 'the look' several times. One time she raced to get in her crate and had no idea he was in there .. oh the looks that came from both of them! Molly sleeps in her crate.

I've tried DAP and Zylkene on Molly and neither had a noticeable difference so I'm really wary of getting the Feliway and Zylkene for Memphis - especially as it isn't cheap. Did it really work that well on your ferals, that they stopped attacking the dogs (btw can we have some more pictures of Sunny, Sky and Jazz .. please

).

Quote from: Sam (Fussy_Furball) on September 21, 2009, 13:47:17 PM

the following link may be of interest Den:

http://cats.suite101.com/article.cfm/how_stop_a_cat_attacking_a_dog

Sam, that has helped a great deal thanks. Most of it I've done, buuuut I have been yelling

and I even gave myself a headache with all the "Memphis, no! Don't you dare!" but I notice that positive training works with cats, so I'm going to give that a go. I knew that you can't punish cats, but had no idea you could use positive training. Redirection, here we come!!

I might end up with a fat cat at the end of it though.

PS - I had no idea cats attacking dogs was a problem, that article has opened my eyes.

Liz · « **Reply #11 on:** September 21, 2009, 13:51:21 PM »

Den we have dog crates for the boys and they can retreat if they are getting beaten up by the ferals - more often than not they will find 2 or 3 ferals in their crates and both back of and look longingly for somewhere to sleep!

I would advise the crate if you have room - our boys both sleep in their crates at night = both have blankies on top with cat beds and have their own nightime cat

have you tried Feliway or Zylkene - we have used it on some of the ferals when they were doing the slasher impression to poor boys noses!

Sam (Fussy_Furball) · « **Reply #10 on:** September 21, 2009, 13:47:17 PM »

the following link may be of interest Den:

http://cats.suite101.com/article.cfm/how_stop_a_cat_attacking_a_dog

Den · « **Reply #9 on:** September 21, 2009, 13:34:49 PM »

He is insured.

Maybe I spoil him too much

Both have areas of the house where they can go without the other one, so they aren't on top of each other. Molly eats downstairs, Memphis eats upstairs. Their toys are in different areas and no one plays with the incorrect toys. There is enough of everything so that neither one has to share - if both want to curl up on a chair they can have one each. Molly doesn't disturb him when he sleeps .. she just ignores him. It's like he goes out of his way to beat her up.

If they are left on their own (which is never for a long time, as I nearly always get someone to babysit) then I keep them separate. I do my best at splitting myself 3 ways but Memphis feels the need to always be with me. I do try my best at keeping things as equal and fair as possible.

alisonandarchie · « **Reply #8 on:** September 21, 2009, 13:30:37 PM »

Hope it sorts itself out

Memphis does have a look of Bengal about him

Den · « **Reply #7 on:** September 21, 2009, 13:15:39 PM »

Quote from: Dawn F on September 21, 2009, 12:51:15 PM

how old is he, I know that bengals change a bit when they mature - it doesn't happen until they are 2 but not sure about other cats

Do you know what .. when he was a teeny tiny blip all the rescue staff/vets/vet nurses etc thought that his litter were part oriental. They just didn't look like any of the other kittens in at the time. Bengal was mentioned a number of times. Now he's all grown up I can see that is not the case at all and he's 100% bog standard moggie .. I don't think he's forgotten what they all said as you can go down the list of Bengal traits and tick them all off with him.

Janeyk · « **Reply #6 on:** September 21, 2009, 13:10:51 PM »

It does sound like they have different personalities Den, hope you manage to sort this out

Gill (sneakiefeline) · « **Reply #5 on:** September 21, 2009, 13:08:03 PM »

Do you have insurance , cos if so often it covers up to about £250 for behavioral advice but must be reccomended by a vet

Den · « **Reply #4 on:** September 21, 2009, 13:06:07 PM »

Thanks Gill.

He is in indoor cat. He's been here since he was 7/8 weeks old or so. He's now 2 (Molly is 4). They've always got on fine. I know Molly would try to initiate play with him (by play bowing) but that got lost in communication with them being different species and she gave up. He does like to play rough, but he's being full on with her. He's never physically hurt her but she does get a bit grumbly and she has squealed once or twice.

I would love to get him a friend but I can't comfortably afford another animal at the moment as finances are tight. I'm also really scared whether he would accept another cat

Dawn F · « **Reply #3 on:** September 21, 2009, 12:51:15 PM »

how old is he, I know that bengals change a bit when they mature - it doesn't happen until they are 2 but not sure about other cats

Gill (sneakiefeline) · « **Reply #2 on:** September 21, 2009, 12:49:16 PM »

I wonder if he just wants her to play......is he an indoor cat, I cant remember?

I wonder if a littlke friend of his own type would help him........a very difficult problem

He has been there since a kitten, isnt that right?

Den · « **Reply #1 on:** September 21, 2009, 12:28:45 PM »

I think I just need to vent before I break something ..

He and Molly have always tolerated each other. I've never had any problems between the pair of them but ...

Memphis has a very evil bully side to him which has shown itself far too much over the past few days. For some reason he will not leave Molly alone - he hides and then pounces on her, claws and teeth all out. It is really stressing Molly out. She is a very placid dog who wouldn't hurt a fly, as such she won't tell him off, she just runs away and hides ... then he chases her and it just goes round in circles. She eventually comes running to me for protection and is clearly very upset. Thing is the frequency and length of time of this happening is increasing at a huge rate and it's just getting too much. I can tell him not to but as soon as my back is turned he pounces

and it's impossible to catch him (human chasing cat, chasing dog

)

The other day Molly was being fed Chicken .. he came over, sat above her and bit her on the head. Then he punched her

Needless to say, he got told to vamoosh and didn't get a treat. If she is nice and settled he just CANNOT resist disturbing her. Seriously, it's like having two toddlers where one picks on the other at the moment.

I do get the impression it's jealousy related .. I don't have a clue why he would be jealous as he gets more attention than poor Molly does and if he thinks he can have me all to himself he is seriously mistaken. And it isn't boredom either.
How do you stop a cat from bullying .. it's only a matter of time before Molly packs her bags and leaves

I'm also scared that because of the way he's being he won't ever accept another cat which would be such a shame. I want to nip this in the bud .. at the moment one is at one end of the room and the other one is at the other end.

I love him so much but,

Author Topic: Memphis is stressing me out at the moment (Read 4841 times)