Approx 2am: Duff duff duff duff duff duff duff duff duff duff. "Get out the bin". Silence.
2.03am: Duff duff duff duff duff duff duff duff duff duff CRASH! "Dave, you're a bad boy". Switch on light and CHILLI is staring back at me! Pick up bin, pick up contents, including half a bins worth of veggie peelings, or at least that's what it felt like. Turn bin wrong way round to discourage them and push back into slot under counter. Back to bed.
2.10am: Scratch rustle, scratch rustle, scratch rustle, scratch rustle. "You two, leave the bin alone!". Scratch rustle, scratch rustle, scratch rustle, scratch rustle. "Right, you win". Get up, deposit a few biscuits in each dish because clearly they are such deprived starved moggies they need an extra feed and go back to bed. Crunch crunch crunch. Purr purr purr in my ear, Dave snuggles up, silence descends.
4am: Scratch rustle, scratch rustle, scratch rustle, scratch rustle CRASH! Stick hand out, Dave still on bed. Chilli removing contents of bin to see if there is anything worth eating, Dave joins her. I give up, roll over and go back to sleep.
8am: Pull a sicky.
8.30am: Get up to find bin contents all over floor.
Dave was bad enough but now it would appear Chilli is also a scavenger and clearly they are not motivated by hunger but pure greed!