please help, bullying?

[nicchick]

thanks for the replies...... you have put my mind at rest! kookie was already neutered when we got her........ simba is also nuetered.

Kookie doesnt seem to be bothering simba to play more than he bothers her to play, as she loves sitting on my lap, and he is still a playful 2.5 yr old. Although I certainly do think its simba just simply being to rough for her. Mind you, he is a maine coon, and she is normal cat size so he is much bigger!!

I am also making sure I give simba extra attention, incase its a bit of a jealousy thing.

thanks, at least I now know what I should be doing 

nikki

[Happy Moggy]

You're being a good cat mummy by being worried, but I agree with everyone else that there is nothing to worry about.

Simba is finding out where the boundaries are, and will soon get bored of pushing them.  If he doesn't, he will find himself without a cat play partner, and will stop being silly.

[Gill (sneakiefeline)]

I agree with the others and would let them sort this out themselves and only intervene if it gets nasty.

He may just be wanting to play and she may be leading him on a bit 

I hope that she is either neutered or about to be cos this may be part of the problem if she is not

[dabs]

Maybe Simba would appreciate a boy to play with    lads like to rough and tumble with each other where as girls are more mature

Does that not go for humans as well! 

[Millys Mum]

Are they both neutered?
Maybe Simba would appreciate a boy to play with    lads like to rough and tumble with each other where as girls are more mature

[HaneyHarperIndyMum (Val)]

I agree with Dawn F and think you should just ignore it, that is unless there is really true harm/injury being caused.  I see no reason to keep them separate at night.  I think by doing that you make be doing more harm than good.  It seems to me that Simba is still setting the ground rules with your new kitten.  I'm sure your new kitten, who is high energy, is just wanting to play with Simba and at times Simba has had enough and just wants to be left alone.   Don't worry so much about it as I'm sure they will pick up on your being tense about it. 

[Dawn F]

I still get the odd hiss with a couple of mine - I'd ignore it, if you make a fuss they start to think it is scary, I agree with Sheryl it all sounds ok, if she knows the hiding places but chooses not to use them she can't be too scared

[nicchick]

Hi well she has plenty of places she can fit and hide that he cant get into, but she never does?? She knows the nooks and crannys as she is a nosy little thing so explores them then, but doesnt very often use them as hiding places. She tends to just lie on the floor, paws in the air complaining very loudly.

So should I leave them to get on with it when she complains at him? When should I intervene? At the moment I do it if she hisses and he carries on, or should I ignore the hisses too?? He does get rough but I dont think he would actually hurt her.

Yes most of the time they seem to get on just fine.

nikkix

[sheryl]

As long as the little one can get away from him when she has has enough I wouldnt worry too much - they sound as if they are getting along most of the time.  She will get her own back when she is a big girl.

[nicchick]

Hello, well I got a new kitten about 4.5 weeks ago, and the intros went really well........ At the moment they are together whenever we are at home, but I still separate them at night.

The reason for this is that my existing cat simba (2.5yrs old) does seem to bully the kitten (she is now 5 months old) about once or twice a day - he will continually prod and nip her and chase her until she is complaining loudly (she does however complain vocally quite often - if she wants something and you take it away, or if we dont let her go somewhere she wants), and sometimes she even hisses at him, but even that doesnt seem to make him stop. He isnt in danger of hurting her as he isnt that rough, but Im not happy as it worries and upsets her.  The "bullying" usually goes on for about 15 minutes and then he leaves her alone.

The rest of the time they sleep next to each other and follow each other around, and she still initiates play with him..... Im guessing (not that I have any knowledge to base this on!) that he is a little bit jealous as she is very much a lap cat, and he is trying to make sure she knows he is in charge.

I know its early days yet but what should I do when he is picking on her? He isnt being viscious as I said, but she doesnt like it. I could give him "time out" for ten minutes to calm him down, but then I worry when we do start leaving them together he will just pick on her when we arent there. Should I leave them and only intervene if he is actually hurting her?? I dont know what to do, and I wouldnt be happy leaving them alone together at the moment. I just want them to both feel happy and safe.

What to do?!?! Please help!