Resident boy being rough with new girl :scared:

[Millys Mum]

Tha facial expressions are spot on in your art work  My lot do that all the time and leave clumps of hair just after you've hoovered.

[Stuart]

I think back now, and through all the years THIS was the funniest thing I ever saw my Furbabe's do
I said I couldn't do nothing for laughing, that wasn't 100% true, when I saw that Hamish was getting the better of Misty,
I just thought (Hamish's Revenge !!!  ) If you knew what Misty was like you'd understand
and the expressions on Misty's Face, So Determined To Bite So Annoyed that He Couldn't !!

[Millys Mum]

PMSL stuart   

[unseeliechylde]

Ah yes, there were one or two of those scenarios here a few days ago  Usually, Riley aldo comes of worse due to needle-like kitten claws! Thankfully, Skye is fairly restrained, and keeps her claws sheathed most of the time. We are now at the stage where a growl and glare is usually enough to make Riley rethink his approach

[Stuart]

could just be a dominance thing, although My Hamish N Misty were like this for year's, they really got on and alway's
slept together but there were occasions when thing's did get out of hand a wee bit  , there was never
any real fight's ( not Vicious) and never any blood drawn.. Hamish was VERY " couthie and laid back " where as
Misty was usually the aggressor if Hamish was crying out in pain I would step in ( but usually he looked after
Himself  )
but there was one day I couldnt do nothing for laughing, and I so wish I'd a camera to film it or something

Like I said it was usually Misty who would start the fighting, but one day Hamish was sleeping and for NO reason
Misty jumped up beside Him on the Seat and started to Bite Him But Hamish was already lying down and just
went into the defensive position, so the scene I saw next was that the Aggressor was standing on all 4 paws
(so He couldnt Grab or Swipe Hamish) And He couldnt get in about to bite Hamish, cause everytime Misty tried
to bite He got a Double hind Paw Smash to the Face!! And He Looked well and truly hacked off about this
this must have lasted about 5 minute's and Misty walked away from that one well and truly Battered and His ego
Bruised 
must also say Misty always seemed to come of worse with the scratches, cause Hamish's claws were like needle's

Please excuse the drawing, it was done with the Mouse 

[unseeliechylde]

Thanks everyone
things are going a lot better - he's learned some manners and restraint, and she's learned that staying calm and ignoring him means he lets go and just looks mildly confused He even licked her and head-butted her today 

[Desley (booktigger)]

I have posted on your CC thread.

[unseeliechylde]

lol glad to hear I'm not the only over-protective cat-mommy! 
Like you say, she doesn't seem at all upset by it all, and sometimes initiates it - in fact I've just watched her licking Riley and cheek-rubbing him while he is flaked out in his bed, so she clearly adores him, no matter how rough he plays!

[hOrZa]

When mine do similar it scares me a bit too but as you say she keeps going back as does my little one Stig approx 10 weeks, Marco and Polo are approx 5 months and I worry about it getting to rough but if he lets out a squeak they release him ok, and sometimes its him biting to hard too.

[unseeliechylde]

Thank you! I had hoped things would calm down after she was "done", but it's always good to hear from other people. To be honest, if it was possible, I would have her spayed tomorrow, but Tues was the earliest the vet could fit us in. It's going to be quite a job to stop her wanting to play, and him from going along with her!
It's also good to hear that this rough play is normal - I've had cats before, of course, but never more than one at a time. I used to have pet rats, and always had a rule of "no blood, no foul", because they can be pretty rough with each other, too. I guess I'm just being over-sensitive because she is so little compared to him, she is my first baby girl, and she is still settling in. Thankfully, she is at least big enough to stand up for herself, and seems to have plenty of resilience and confidence, no matter what Riley does!

[Millys Mum]

Thats how cats play! It seems rough but they like it. My lot roll and thrash around and pull tufts of hair out, i was concerned at first but realise now its their way of doing things 

In regards to her spay see if she can have glue and that elimintes the possible need for a collar. Not all cats mess with their stitches and some rip em out and have staples instead 
The first few days are most important while everything knits together inside, they tend to act like nothing has happened tho and argue with being kept quiet 

Edit to add she will need a scrummy chicken dinner to make up for it!

[Gill (sneakiefeline)]

I am pleased she is getting spayed next week cos she is at risk if not.

Hopefully once she has settled down after the op all the agressive stuff will stop although young cats do like to play fight, posibly she is leading the boys on at the moment 

She will probably have a collar on after the op and she will need not to be attcked or purrrrrrrrrsued till after her stiches are out....anout 10 days I think.

I am sure lots of others will give you more info and practical advice 

[unseeliechylde]

Hi everyone! 
Apologies in advance for the length of this post, but I’m looking for a bit of advice / reassurance....
I have a lovely, well-trained, sweet, polite 1 & 1/2 year old neutered male red tuxedo tabby called Riley, who I adopted from PAWSS a year ago. I live in a flat in the city, so he is an indoor cat. He is very healthy and affectionate, though not a lap-cat, and has plenty of little vantage points around the place that are exclusively "his" space, as well as a cat tree and plenty of toys.
However, I thought he might benefit from a playmate, as I work during the week and he doesn't get to play as much as he would like.
Last week, I "adopted" (on a trial basis) a very sweet, confident little 5 month old female dilute tortie (Skye), also from PAWSS, who is currently "intact". PAWSS was happy for her to stay on a trial basis to see how they got on before I made a decision about whether or not to keep her.
To my surprise and delight, they got on very well with only a few minor misunderstandings, and seemed to be settling well with each other. I was very careful that they both got equal attention, toys, treats, food etc. so that my resident boy did not get too jealous. I duly contacted the rescue agency to finalise the adoption, which will go ahead on Friday. Typically, having done this, all hell has broken loose!
Though they have been playfully chasing each other all week, last night things got very rough. Riley, my older boy, has started to play VERY rough: he is chasing her as before, but has started grabbing her by her neck, jumping on her back, wrestling, biting and kicking her, only releasing her when she shrieks, fights back, runs and hides, or I intervene.
Bizarrely, she still approaches and attempts to initiate play as before, despite his rough treatment.
I have booked her in to get spayed next week, as I suspect that this behaviour is sexual aggression, possibly set off by her being about to come into estrus, and that it should subside once she is neutered.
Apologies for the very long post....any thoughts? I would welcome any advice / input!
I am going to have her spayed regardless, and hopefully she won't come into estrus before next Tuesday (when she will be having the op). My main concern is that this rough treatment might continue immediately after her operation, while she is still in recovery.
While she is currently entirely capable of standing up for herself, being 5 months old, I'm worried about the potential risks to her while she is healing. 
I'm inclined to think it is sexual aggression because they sleep happily near each other, and have long periods of getting along perfectly peacefully. The roughousing only develops when their play-chasing escalates into this wrestling/mating type behaviour from Riley (presumably because he gets a bit over-excited). Though he is the only one being rough, he is not always the one to initiate chasing. Skye (the little girl) is just as likely to wind him up, even after him being very rough with her - she is apparently quite happy to provoke him, even though she objects strenuously to being grabbed and jumped on! 
I've never nursed a little girl through spaying before (I've only ever had boys neutered, all my previous girls were already "done" when I got them) - any advice / pointers? I was planning on shutting her in the bedroom with a litter tray, food, water etc and a heater, while I am at work, to ensure she gets peace and quiet and will rest. Obviously, while I'm at home she'll be free to potter around and do as she likes, albeit under supervision. Is there anything I can do to help her recover and heal quickly, and prevent Riley being too rough with her?