Author Topic: DO YOU UNDERSTAND WHAT I AM TRYING TO SAY?  (Read 2665 times)

Offline blackcat

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Re: DO YOU UNDERSTAND WHAT I AM TRYING TO SAY?
« Reply #11 on: September 17, 2007, 19:25:33 PM »
Ela, I have emailed the edited version to you. Hope it helps.

Offline fluffybunny

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Re: DO YOU UNDERSTAND WHAT I AM TRYING TO SAY?
« Reply #10 on: September 17, 2007, 19:20:21 PM »
I agree - it does launch off talking about vouchers and authorities without explaining exactly what these are and what they do.  Of course the fact that you've already sent them would mean that they should know by now, but I don't think a refresh along the lines suggested, would hurt.

I'd also suggest putting the options into a table format, so it looks like 'tick one box from the list below' - that might make it look like a simple one paragraph letter (explaining that you haven't used the free neutering voucher and we'd be interested to know why) rather than a long letter - and may encourage more people to read it.

Does that make sense?  :shify:

Offline blackcat

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Re: DO YOU UNDERSTAND WHAT I AM TRYING TO SAY?
« Reply #9 on: September 17, 2007, 18:33:34 PM »
While the message contains all that you wish to say, I feel that the structure of the letter is a little confusing to me. Some of the dot points contain more than one idea and some of the dot points do not appear to be particularly pertinent to the point you are trying to convey.

I agree with the suggested amendment to the first paragraph but was wondering if you think I could make a positive contribution by sending you an edited version. If I use 'track changes' and 'insert comment' would you be able to follow this on your computer's software??

Offline Tiggy's Mum

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Re: DO YOU UNDERSTAND WHAT I AM TRYING TO SAY?
« Reply #8 on: September 17, 2007, 13:04:49 PM »
It's clear to me but if some people are just not 'getting it' maybe you could adjust the first pragraph to make it crystal clear for them  :evillaugh:

Copy letter:-

You but you recently accepted a reduced fee / free neutering voucher from CP, the voucher's are only valid for a certain amount of time and it looks like yours has expired without being used. Due to a large demand I have very few reduced fee / free neutering vouchers left and would like to know if you need me to save you some or if I can issue them to someone else. 

In view of this will you please contact me (you may reverse the charges) and let me know which of the following applies: -

1 If you still have the cat/s and want me to save a voucher for you. The anesthetics used at most Vets now are very safe In fact this simple proceedure could actually save your cats life, and can still be done free of charge

2 If you book the cat1s in at Carrick Vets 93 Newbold Rd, 273292 or 01629 581234 (Matlock) or 01246 811233 (Clowne) or Chapel House Vets 222232 we will pay the full cost, In this case you will need to show this letter to the vet. they will ask us for a full cost voucher . If you make your appointment for a Tuesday – Friday you can take the cat in the night before the op so that if necessary you can still go to work.

3.   You have the cat/s but for some reason you do not want the cat/s to be neutered/spayed If this is your decision please read the reverse of this sheet re neutering facts. Sadly everyday we see and hear the about the terrible injuries and illnesses which could have been prevented if the cat had been neutered/spayed.

4.   You do not now have the cat/s

5.   You have given the cat/s to someone else; if this is the case please let me know their name and address so I may send them vouchers.

6.   You have had the cat/s neutered/spayed; it is possible the vet has not requested the voucher. If this is the case please let me know so the vet does not invoice you at a later date.

7.              If transport is a problem please let me know and we will take the cat for you.



Offline Ela

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Re: DO YOU UNDERSTAND WHAT I AM TRYING TO SAY?
« Reply #7 on: September 17, 2007, 11:43:04 AM »
Quote
to be honest they probably don't read to the end and I just thought as it was not to far down capitals might draw the eye!

I think most do as it is surprising how many suddenly tell me they have no transport. Although had that been mentioned when they first asked for a voucher I would have offered to take the cat.
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Offline Dawn F

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Re: DO YOU UNDERSTAND WHAT I AM TRYING TO SAY?
« Reply #6 on: September 17, 2007, 11:27:02 AM »
to be honest they probably don't read to the end and I just thought as it was not to far down capitals might draw the eye!

Offline Ela

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Re: DO YOU UNDERSTAND WHAT I AM TRYING TO SAY?
« Reply #5 on: September 17, 2007, 11:25:20 AM »
Quote
its clear to me but maybe you could put the bit about it being free in caps?

I have already amended the letter and at the top  I have put free offer in huge red letters. Mind you when we have the £5 special offers I make it very clear with a huge £5 in red on, yet some folks still don't seem to understand.
« Last Edit: February 29, 2008, 15:56:25 PM by Ela »
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Offline clarenmax

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Re: DO YOU UNDERSTAND WHAT I AM TRYING TO SAY?
« Reply #4 on: September 17, 2007, 11:11:30 AM »
Its very clear to me as well Ela.

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Offline Dawn F

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Re: DO YOU UNDERSTAND WHAT I AM TRYING TO SAY?
« Reply #3 on: September 17, 2007, 11:08:13 AM »
its clear to me but maybe you could put the bit about it being free in caps?

Offline Mark

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Re: DO YOU UNDERSTAND WHAT I AM TRYING TO SAY?
« Reply #2 on: September 17, 2007, 11:05:55 AM »
It is crystal clear with everyting covered Ela. The standard of literacy has declined so much over the last few years that maybe you need to offer a tape-recorded version  :evillaugh:

You have to bear in mind, they are personally doing you a huge favour by accepting the voucher  :-:
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Offline Ela

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DO YOU UNDERSTAND WHAT I AM TRYING TO SAY?
« Reply #1 on: September 17, 2007, 11:01:54 AM »
As many of you know I am responsible for issuing the vouchers for neuters and spays for our branch of Cats Protection.
When I receive a phone call for a voucher I send an authority, advise the caller to ring the vets that day and on the day of the 'op' hand the voucher to the vet. At the end of each  month the vet then sends me a list of all neuters/spays ‘done’

To those who have not used the authorities usually as many as 50% I send a letter (copy below).. I am wondering if it is understandable as last Wednesday I sent 25 and already I have received 9 calls from the recipients saying  I cant afford to have my cat ‘done’. When I advise them that all they need to do is make the appointment and hand the vet the letter they seem bemused.
I have been doing this for years but never before have I received so many calls about the letter.

Is it me that is thick? No please don’t answer that.

Copy letter:-

Sorry to bother you but due to a large demand I have very few vouchers left and would like to know if you need me to save you some or if I can issue them to someone else.

The authority I sent you was not used. In view of this will you please contact me (you may reverse the charges) and let me know which of the following applies: -

1 If you still have the cat/s and want me to save a voucher for you. The anesthetics used at most Vets now are very safe In fact this simple proceedure could actually save your cats life, and can still be done free of charge

2 If you book the cat/s in at Carrick Vets 93 Newbold Rd, 273292 or 01629 581234 (Matlock) or 01246 811233 (Clowne) or Chapel House Vets 222232 we will pay the full cost, In this case you will need to show this letter to the vet. they will ask us for a full cost voucher . If you make your appointment for a Tuesday – Friday you can take the cat in the night before the op so that if necessary you can still go to work.

3.   You have the cat/s but for some reason you do not want the cat/s to be neutered/spayed If this is your decision please read the reverse of this sheet re neutering facts. Sadly everyday we see and hear the about the terrible injuries and illnesses which could have been prevented if the cat had been neutered/spayed.

4.   You do not now have the cat/s

5.   You have given the cat/s to someone else; if this is the case please let me know their name and address so I may send them vouchers.

6.   You have had the cat/s neutered/spayed; it is possible the vet has not requested the voucher. If this is the case please let me know so the vet does not invoice you at a later date.

7.              If transport is a problem please let me know and we will take the cat for you.

« Last Edit: September 17, 2007, 14:17:41 PM by Ela »
RULES ARE FOR THE OBEDIENCE OF FOOLS AND GUIDENCE OF WISE MEN.

 


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