Nervous Cats

[Gill (sneakiefeline)]

I think you have to take it slowly but Wizz favoured teaching Sasa via her food, we got some way in but I couldnt deal with Misa being hungry all the time and them not being able to have food left down.

Here is what she suggested:

Put their food down at set times only and dont leave food out for them.
When you put their food down you stand, sit, kneel about 6 foot away from it and stay there until they have eaten.
Once they are happy eating that distance from you, bring the dishes a foot closer.

Slowly as they get happy eating a certain distance from you, gradually make the distance between you and dishes closer until they are eating next to you........................do not attempt to touch them unless they come to you and ask for attention.

If they eat treats or biscuits.....something special and different from normal food, put some  in another room on one side of room and sit on the other while they eat them.

Once they will have them in your prescence, move them a bit closer to you.

As they get happy eating at each position, move them until they are right close to you................you should have started siiting on floor ages ago LOL

Once they will eat next to you put the treats in your hand................and thats wher I got to cos sasa will eat out of my hand. By now she should have been coming for attention and strokes but I had to stop it, I tried stroking her the othervnight but she cringed backwards and hates it.

Sasa came to me at 8yrs old and is now 10, so this should be much easier with younger cats and you must not try to touch them throughout unless they come to you and say rub or headbut you.......its all a matter of trust and patience and TLC.

I hope you have quick success and this is to enable them to associate you would something they like, without any threat and to hopefully they will come to you and want to be stroked.

Also playing with fishing rod toys like da bird may help as long as you do not move it tto fast or suddenly. Because you are playing at a distance they dont feel threatened.

Sasa will also play as long as she is about 18inches to 2ft away from me. She also loves the laser chasing toy...........you must not shine it in their eyes............and limit all toys and games to about 5- 10 mins. Sasa also likes feathers and real catnip mice.

Hope this might help a bit.

[ginge66]

Thanks everyone for your advice,have decided not to take on a new kitten just yet. If I'm honest I think I'm still grieving for Nigel and I miss not having a cat to fuss. I feel it will be a long journey with Leo and Lawrence but one I am willing to make. Although the rescue shelter didn't like to describe them as feral I feel they are more that than domesticated. Their history is that they where rescued at six weeks old after living wild with their mother, fostered for a short while until they were brought to the cattery come rescue centre in October last year.Progress so far, Leo will take biscuits from me and is busy exploring the house as I type but still runs scared of me and doesn't like being stroked. Lawrence, very scardy cat hisses constantly but will eat biscuits thrown to him but constantly hides and I value my fingers too much to even attempt to stroke him.Is there anyone on here who has been in a similar situation and can give me some words of encouragement. Will try and post some pictures when I learn how to! Must say this is a brilliant site and I cant believe I have never found it before. Once again many thanks x

[Bazsmum]

Defo not another kitty at the moment as the new kitten could also mimic the others action's and it would only be a 2 on 1 situ then 

Make your self on their level (height wise), dont stare as this will pose a threat to them, blink slowly at them when you look at them with the occasional long drawn out yawn (this puts them at ease with you) but above all patience is the best way.....lots of encouragement, play etc should help..... 

Sorry for the loss of your 3 cats it must of been heartbreaking for you both.....im sure that once youve relaxed the two mentioned it wont be long before you get your 3rd 

[blackcat]

Well what can I do but support the advice others have given. New cats, particularly nervous ones, take time to settle. Be calm with them, don't amake any sudden noises or moves, and let them come to you, not the other way around. Make yourself available by sitting near them and talking to them but not looking directly at them (this is quite threatening in cat language). Good on you for taking them on. and  to the site

[Pinkbear (Julie)]

ginge66

I'm sorry to hear about your losses. We all know how you feel, believe me! 

The rewards that these two older nervous ones will bring you will astound you. They will repay your patience and understanding 10 fold. The day they first climb on your lap for a cuddle and start purring you will cry with joy!

I have to say introducing kittens now won't help and may make them worse. 

[Gill (sneakiefeline)]

So soirry to hear about your cats at the Bridge and understand how horrible it is without a cat around.

My purrrrrrsonal opinion is that you would best to settle the current two first 

[ginge66]

Hi, many thanks for the prompt replies. After loosing three beloved elderly cats in the past 18 months, the last one a mad but lovable cat- Nigel only four weeks ago we suddenly found ourselves catless. We saw an add in the local press for two nervous brothers, Leo and Lawrence and agreed to take them on. I have no regrets about this and realise it will be a slow process but when taking the cat baskets back to the rescue center today they had some kittens up for re-homing and of course fell in love with one. I haven't committed myself, do you think it would do any harm, my priorities are Leo and Lawrence but the kitten was cute
,

[Gill (sneakiefeline)]

  to Purrs

My two big cats came from CP and Misa was so scared cos of what had happened to him before. With me he is a cuddle monster but he is scared of all other people and although he would let me stroke him he hid under the recliner for weeks only coming out behind for food and a stroke. That was over 2 yrs ago and he still hides if anyone comes to the door but he is learning to be a lapcat now 

Sasa was older and is still scared of me getting too close although she will eat treats out of my hand, sounds daft but thats how she is. I cannot stroke her and she trusts nobody, she musta had such a hard and unhappy life before but Wizz got me to the point I am with her 

I am sure with time and love yours will learn to understand that you are their friend and in their time they will love you, even if its like Sasa in her own little way 

[Tiggy's Mum]

Hi Ginge &  to Purrs

How long have you had these two cats?  If it's not very long then hopefully in time they will settle down and become more trusting of you.  Different circumstances I know, but one of my cats (who I've had from a kitten) is over the top confident and super affectionate with me but is very frightened of visitors until he gets to know them.   If these cats are fairly new to your home then they might see you as a scary visitor at the moment, hopefully in time they will get to know you as a loving, caring Mum and open up with you 

There's lots of good advice in these links...

http://wizz-catz.co.uk/timidcat.html

http://wizz-catz.co.uk/bonding.html

As Ruth said a piccie would be great, we do love our pics on here    What are their names too?

[Kittybabe (Ruth)]

If they are new to your house and you they need the most important things from you. Time and space.  Give them as much time as they need to get used to you (some cats can take longer than others), and the space they need to do it in. Best thing is to keep them confined to one room with all their needs met, food, water, litter tray and toys, maybe some gentle music in the background for company. Let them take the lead when they want to explore more of the house. Keep them indoors for a few weeks to get used to the space.

And when you are there with them just sit quietly and talk to them, let them come to you.

Introducing a third cat may just make it worse for them as they need to get familiar with their new home. They are territorial so need to learn to make it their space first.

Good luck and  to our forum. If you have pics we would love to see them!

[ginge66]

We have two new rescue cats that are 1 year old & they are very nervous & shy.
The one will not allow you near without him hissing or striking out, the other one is more friendly but still scared of people, would adding a third more domesticated cat or kitten be of any help in this situation & would it help to build a bridge between us & the scared cats ?