Is this normal?

[caledonia]

V good point Sam 

[Sam (Fussy_Furball)]

I'm sure if Nina's mummy wins her something lovely on the auction it will help to make Nina feel a little bit better   

[caledonia]

Thank you so much for that link Sam - sorry I didn't notice it before 

Yeah Carol it does seem she is grieving. She has been a bit better today in that she did come on my lap for a bit but she is back to sleeping! I nipped home at lunch time as I am trying to make sure she is ok and alone as little as poss. She was just sitting staring out the window and has been sitting at the front door. It breaks my heart.

It's tough for us both I guess - to go from three cats to one in just a matter of weeks is tough but fingers crossed she will be ok and in a few months I can get the right companion for her 

[CarolM (Wendolene)]

I'm sorry about your losses and even more sorry that Nina is causing you worry.    It definitely sounds as though she is grieving and/or confused byu the change in circumstances.  Cats can be very surprising in their reactions.  Many years ago my elderly mum came to live with me bringing her cat Rosie.  I already had my cat Ginger.  They rubbed along together without any real hosility but were never what you would call friends yet when Ginger went to the bridge Rosie pined for weeks.  At first I couldn't believe she was pining and took her to the vets thinking she was ill.  Eventually I got her a companion on the strict undertanding that if it didn't work out I could take him back (I knew it would be immediately obvious whether it was the right or. the wrong thing to do).  Fortunately it was the right thing to do and harmony was restored. 

[Sam (Fussy_Furball)]

Sorry to hear of your recent losses 

It certainly sounds like Nina is grieving ... the following link may be of interest http://www.purrsinourhearts.co.uk/index.php/topic,4929.0.html

[caledonia]

Thanks for the reply 

I think ive been quite surprised by her reaction as she was always the most independent and often swatted Edgar away if he was getting too close or for too long. I also had wondered whether she would have appreciated having me to herself as Edgar was always on me or trying to sit on her if she was on me! She def didnt get as much snuggles thanks to him so I thought she might lap having solo attention right up!

The plan is pretty certainly to get her a companion but I'm due to go abroad for an extended trip and my brother is stepping in and taking her until I'm back. He lived with me before so she knows him and I guess as much as its hard not having the boys it's a blessing they didn't hve the upheaval of a temporary short stay with their uncle. So as much as I would love to get her company now I think in the long run it might be better when I'm back and see how she has been herself.

In the meantime ill shower her with as much love as I can and I know my brother will spoil her rotten :-)

[Gill (sneakiefeline)]

It does sound like she is grieving and missing her friend loads, just like you 

All you can try to do is love her as ,uch as she will let you, pamper her with her fav food and hope that she will get over it soon. Sadly cats can grieve for a long time.

Have you thought whether a new friend for her could be on the cards?

[caledonia]

Hello all,

As some of you may be aware from my recent postings my two old boys have both been PTS since August - Oscar 31/08 and Edgar 09/11.

I have a third cat Nina - she is only three so was a lot younger than them and came to live with us when she was a kitten.  They all lived together from December 2008 until now.

Oscar & Nina didn't take a lot to do with each other although they would sometimes sit side by side on the window ledge and feed side by side. Edgar being the lovely sociable boy he was was close to them both. If he wasn't sleeping curled around Oscar he was around Nina.

Since Oscar died he really became close to Nina and tried to sleep beside her all the time and they groomed each other.

He has now been gone for four days and I feel she has become very withdrawn and I am unsure if I should be doing anything to help her.

I have barely stepped over the door all weekend, I live alone so its strange that we went from a household of four to me and her so quickly. However she isn't really coming near me and has slept all day today. Yesterday she was actually under my bed and didn't even come out when I got up or called her - only when I got her food out.

I realise she will be upset too - but I just wondered if I could do anything to help her. We are both so upset without our boys