Well done Jaffa - he's a quick learner! (or maybe not)

[Susanne (urbantigers)]

It does sound similar.  It's definitely attention seeking spraying.  I can ignore whining and scratching but it's so hard to ignore spraying.  It causes so much damage.  I did ignore it last week but I'm trying now to prevent it happening in the first place but withdrawing a bit of attention and trying to get him to accept that I initiate fuss and not him (limited success!).  He does seem to have whined for attention less this week and he's woken up later so maybe it's working and the need to spray (which arises from frustration at not getting attention, I think) is lessening.

[Leanne]

I don't know if this is the same or not but we had real issues with Jess and Milo scratching our sofas when they couldn't get what they wanted.

It was mostly during the night (well 4:30am onwards) because we wouldn't get up to feed them then, they would go and scratch which would result in Hubby jumping up and running downstairs shouting at them.

Over time they have got better but its caused lots of friction between hubby and I. I'm all for ignoring them and what they are doing but he gets up, what I've made Hubby realise is that by him getting up they are getting a reaction.

Milo will still do naughty things to get attention though. If I am late home from work I'll find his done something naughty, usually kicking his water bowls over. When we went away the other week the cat sitter said they had knocked the phone out of the cradle and been kicking it around. And last night Hubby was in the bath (with the door shut) I was watching TV when Milo strolled in and squashed himself behind the telly and sat chewing cables, all because no one would play with him. I ended up getting up and shouting at him and putting him in the bathroom with Hubby - he likes to sit on the toilet and watch hubby bath 

I know its not nice but maybe ignoring the spraying would make Jaffa realise his not getting a reaction from you so in time would make him do it less, not ideal I know.

[Susanne (urbantigers)]

Grrr!  Just typed a post and lost it 

Gist of said post was that the little lad got up at 5am to use tray/stretch legs/have a drink and came back on the bed.  No whining or generally being a pain and definitely no spraying    Perhaps he is learning after all.

[Susanne (urbantigers)]

I'm afraid I've been bottling it for the past week and shutting him out if he wakes early (before he gets going with the whining).  The weather is on my side at the  moment though as the darker monrings seem to be resulting in Jaffa waking.  This mornig it was 5.45am, yesterday was 5.29am, Sunday was 5.18am...!  I'm hoping for a bit later tomorrow.

[Susanne (urbantigers)]

I admit I have gone back to shutting him out now when he wakes up.  This morning he woke about 5am and I shut him out like yesterday as I knew I just had to catch up on a bit of sleep.  He didn't make a peep and I slept through until 8.30am so feel a bit less sleep deprived now.   I don't know yet what I will do on Monday (tomorrow I will probably do the same as this  morning) but I will probably play it by ear depending on what time he wakes.   I am trying to not act when he whines, but to wait for a break in the whining and then I go out into the living room without making eye contact and shut the pair of them in there without speaking to him or giving him a treat (I used to bribe him with a treat  ).   

I am trying to tackle this from the other end, so to speak, as well.  I'm making a conscious effort not to pay quite as much attention to him when I'm at home.  He still gets loads of cuddles and attention, and if he climbs on my knee I will stroke him, but I'm not responding when he cries for attention as I realise I've got into the habit of going straight to him whenever he makes a sound so now I make sure I initiate the fussing and don't do it when he demands it.   I have also got out the treat ball I've not used for years.  Jaffa doesn't have dry food but a few pieces now and then won't hurt so I put a few bits of kibble and a couple of dreamies in the ball last night at 9pm when he started getting a bit whiny for his supper, and it kept both of them amused for longer than I expected (partly due to it getting stuck behind something!). 

[Susanne (urbantigers)]

well I bottled it last night.  He woke at about 4.50am, I was woken up by a whine.  I spoke to him, he came on the bed, I patted him and then decided I was so tired he was going out the back as I just couldn't be bothered with the stress of having him in the bedroom.  So out the back they both went and there wasn't much objection from Jaffa, but after about 10 mins I heard an almighty crash.  On investigation, some bottles on top of the fridge (stuff like simple solution) had fallen over and onto the kitchen unit beside the fridge where they had knocked over several glass herb and spice jars.  everything was on the floor.  I have no idea who was responsible but wasn't impressed.  sorted that out and went back to bed leaving them in the living room.  No noise from Jaffa and no weeing anywhere when I got up.  I did well yesterday evening though with not fussing Jaffa too much (I didn't realise how often I stroke him until I tried to do it a bit less!) but having more games with da bird etc.  I am going to try to treat the cause more by touchingi him less but playing with him more.

[Kirst]

Oh dear!!

I know this sounds totally gross , but if you are going to redecorate the bedroom now is probably the best time to ignore the spraying - hopefully you can break the habit now and then re-decorate and get rid of any lingering 'ahem' odours.

[Susanne (urbantigers)]

Oh dear - I think Jaffa's behaviour might fit this example

The other scenario tends to be highly intelligent, sensitive cat (eg, Siamese, Burmese) meets caring, solicitous, emotional owner resulting in undesirable attention-seeking behaviours and over-attachment.

http://www.fabcats.org/behaviour/overdependent/humancatbond.html

Jaffa sounds a bit like Chichester in that article.  I know I need to ignore him and I can ignore crying and whining, but I cant ignore him spraying urine!

ETA - well I have to say that having read a few articles, I am sure that I have encouraged Jaffa to be over dependent.  I've sort of known this all along, and am not new to the idea of being over attached and having an over dependent cat, but the more I read the more I feel I need to tackle this on several fronts.  I think it's sort of crept up on me.  Jaffa has always been a slightly needy cat and just the sort of purrsonality that is likely to become over dependent given the right encouragement and environment (e.g. being an indoor cat).  He's also quite a sensitive cat who has probably picked up on my stress over the past couple of years re my job situation.  I think it probably started becoming an issue when Magpie died and he became ultra clingy.  I read then about separation anxiety and followed a few steps to deal with that (like not making a big deal out of leaving and arriving home) but then I got Mosi.  I think I have over compensated for bringing Mosi into the house because I felt guilty, so I gave Jaffa even more attention to let him know he was still no.1.  The more attention I've been giving him, the more he wants and the result is a cat who demands attention a lot and will do whatever he has to to get it.  If I don't respond to whining, he will spray.  The whining has been going on for years, but the spraying is a relatively recent thing.   I also think that what the article (and others) say about spraying being a way or releasing frustration applies too.

Trouble is, I know that ignoring the behaviour is essential but I just can't bring myself to let him spray and do nothing.  I will have to try though.  I also think I need to try to give him a bit less attention in general - I do tend to go over and fuss him every time I see him looking at me!  And if I fuss Mosi, I then feel I need to go and give Jaffa one to even things out (even if I fussed Jaffa before Mosi!).

Hmmm  - I have a lot to think about.

[Susanne (urbantigers)]

Clever boy!  Lets just hope he isn't lulling you into a false sense of security!

Unfortunately he was.  I woke up this morning at 4.22am and lay sandwiched between 2 cats wondering whether I really did need to go to the loo or not.  Given the time, I decided I had to get up and couldn't hang on another hour and a half.  That, of course, woke up the pair of them.  When I got back into bed, Jaffa was awake and sitting up but I just ignored him and hoped he'd go back to sleep.  He didn't so I tried to ignore him as I had puppy pads down by the wardrobe.  So he went under the dressing table and started to spray there.  I had to shout to distract him and stop him before he did much.  So there I was at 4.30am, peeling off damp wallpaper (the wallpaper is part stripped for decorating but the decorator didn't try to take it all off because of the poor condition of the walls - he said he didn't want to wet it because the walls weren't in very good conditon) and spraying with Simple solution.  I'm stuck now - ignoring him isn't going to work if he's going to spray wherever he likes - I can't let him do that.  I really don't want to shut him out of the bedroom because he'll probably just do it in the living room then and tbh, I can't bring myself to shut him out of the bedroom when he settles down so nicely on his hot water bottle (yes, even in this weather) at bedtime and looks so cute and comfortable.  This is the only litter tray/spraying problem I have with him now - the rest has stopped.   It's just the attention seeking spraying that he does now.  I don't know how to stop that other than to paper and carpet the entire flat with puppy training pads 

[Sam (Fussy_Furball)]

Clever boy!  Lets just hope he isn't lulling you into a false sense of security!

[McHaggis]

Good boy Jaffa  hope tonight is a good night too for you xxx

[Susanne (urbantigers)]

We've been here before with night time whinging (I say night time, he probably reckons it's mornig as it's light outside) and I had to be tough and ignore him last time to get him to realise it didn't work.  Then I had a similar problem in that I was worried he'd spray the wardrobe if I ignored him (the wardrobe is his favourite - and original - spray site!).  That was when we just had the occasional spraying though.  Before the hall spraying started on a regular basis.  For months now I've woken in the night - any time between 4-5am but sometimes earlier - to the sound of Jaffa whining for attention.  I've tried putting him out of the bedroom (shut in living room/kitchen) and various strategies but they all result in him getting some sort of attention.  For ages I was getting up and pulling his litter tray out from the corner of the living room and taking the hood off to try and persuade him to use it (in the hope that he would then not go anywhere else) before going back to bed.   But enough is enough and I've decided to tough it out.  Monday night I put puppy pads by the wardrobe and ignored him.  He sprayed at about 5am but I ignored it (for a while!).  Last night?  I did wake briefly to the sound of one of them scraping the litter tray, but went back to sleep immediately.  Next thing I knew I was woken by my alarm and Jaffa was lying quiety on my pillow above my head    Not a peep out of him!  I was very impressed.  Lets hope he keeps it up.