Here's ours
11.30: Head up to bed, cats are sleeping on sofa/fishtank but as soon as I walk towards the kitchen (have to go past it to get upstairs, they wake up thinking they are getting food.
11.35: Go into bathroom to brush teeth, Amber follows me in and sticks her head in the toilet.
11.40: Remove Amber from bathroom and close door (if I don't notice she is there, there will be loud wailing in abobut 5 mins time)
11.45: Get into bed and open book.
11.46: Chilli jumps onto bed, walks the full length of my body, settles down between me and the book and dribbles on my neck.
11.47: Put down book, start stroking Chilli, she gets bored and walks onto OH to attack his beard, I go back to my book.
11.50: Cats decide now is the best time to begin world war 3, this involves very load thundering round the whole flat chasing each other, throwing themselves at the stair rail and knocking over anything they can find.
12.00: Cats calm down and settle either at the end of the bed or under it. Having read about 3 pages of my book, my eyes won't stay open so I put the book down, take my lenses out and turn off the light.
6.00am: Foot has strayed out of the end of the bed, foot treated as if scary monster by Chilli who swipes at it until it retreats under the covers.
6.05: OH rolls over because Amber was sitting/standing on his back, thump noise as Amber falls/jumps onto the floor.
6.10: Chilli finds a way under the covers between me and OH, does a few circles and squashes herself up against me.
6.30: There is a hedgehog in my bed... oh no, thats just Chilli clawing at my bare skin from under the covers.
6.35: Load siamesey yells start coming from Amber followed by a loud crash as she lands on top of the bedroom tv and makes her way onto the windowsill.
6.36: Hideous noise of cat claws on wall paint as Amber tries to catch a spec of dust on the wall, get up and remove her from the windowsill.
6.40-7.15: Cats conduct a highly organised series of licks, scratches, meows, walking over pillows/face/body, sticking wet noses and whiskers into ears and up nose in an attempt to rouse half asleep humans.
7.30: Success, I get up and go downstairs to the bathroom, I can't see a thing so need to put lenses in, accompanied by a choir of wailing cats, Chilli wanders round the edge of the sink generally getting in the way and Amber has her head in the toilet.
7.40: Now I can see what I'm doing, feed cats and pour my cereal, go into front room to eat.
7.45: Finish cereal and place bowl on floor, Amber is waiting and watching my every move ready to lap up whats left of the milk.
