Dilemma about leaving Jess , should I or not

[Leanne]

just a thought as obviously don't know your family situation, but could your husband not go down and see his mum while you stay home and look after Jess? That's a sort of compromise. Hope you manage to sort something out; know how hard it can be with sick cats and family not always understanding! On your train ticket, you could change it if it's not refundable couldn't you (or have they stopped doing that now  ).

This is what I've suggested to Hubby, plus I think it'll do him good to see him Mum without me to be honest, but he would rather I come too.

I think I need to follow my heart and deep down I know that, especally how Jess is at the moment, leaving him would be far too upsetting all round.

The train tickets are non refundable as they are leisure advance purchases, but at the end of the day I don't care if I lose the money, Jess Cat has to come first

I think I am going to see how things go, especally with me being away next weekend, and then talk to Hubby about it more when I get back but I feel my decision is made.

Thanks everyone for your advice and thoughts and for not making me feel like a mad cat woman

[Maddiesmum]

I would follow my heart.  Things may well be fine with Jess but if anything did go wrong you would never forgive yourself.  You can always visit the MIL another time

[swampmaxmum]

just a thought as obviously don't know your family situation, but could your husband not go down and see his mum while you stay home and look after Jess? That's a sort of compromise. Hope you manage to sort something out; know how hard it can be with sick cats and family not always understanding! On your train ticket, you could change it if it's not refundable couldn't you (or have they stopped doing that now  ).

[clarenmax]

I think you should go with your instinct on this one.  I know its at the risk of upsetting your MIL, but if she's not an animal person, she won't understand anyway. 

If you do go, and you're worrying the whole time anyway, you won't enjoy yourself, and she'll probably pick up on that and moan anyway 

There will be other times to see the family, maybe when Jess is a bit less susceptible to blockages.

 

[Leanne]

Thanks Gill, have changed it,

Katie our sitter is very good, she knows exactly what to look for (she's a VN) and she texts me after every visit (whether we're in the UK or not) she spends about 45 minutes with them per visit which is twice a day.

We are lucky with Jess and Milo its pretty easy to tell who has been where, (Milo will scrape every piece of litter into a mole hill, where Jess will go and wee and not even cover it) Katie knows them well enough to know this and Jess does like her.

I just feel stuck at the moment, my heart lies with my fur babies and I don't want to leave them (I never do though) but I know I'm going to cause family arguements (MIL isn't animal friendly really which makes it worse)

Sorry for wittering on!

[blackcat]

How long does your cat sitter spend with your cats when she comes in? It is tricky in a multicat household, but she should be able to see if he is blocking simply because of the evidence in the litter tray. Can you describe his symptoms well enough for her to be on the alert, or is it possible that it might be better for him to spend the time you are away at the vets as a prophylatic measure?

If you can negotiate not to go to to Devon (just this time) that would be best, but I can imagine the angst that might cause .........

[Gill (sneakiefeline)]

No you havent posted in the wrong place but a better title would help so people look at it.

Go back to your first post and modify, change the title so peeps can see what the problem is.

I can only talk from my point of view but I most certainly would not go away from Jess leaving him with a "stranger" for the three days.

I think he needs a lot of stability right now to stop him being stressed and getting ill again. Surely your family can understand this.

[Leanne]

Given what Jess has been going though lately (stress related cysitis, blocked bladder etc) the trigger seems to be when we're away from the house overnight, a fews days later we have an episode of cystitis and blocking.

Next week I am going to New York with my sister for 3 nights, during this time Hubby is at home with the cats (transforming the garden), I'm happy to leave them as I know he will obviously look after them and he knows what to look out for in Jess, I also think it'll give them a chance to bond a bit more as I do most things for them (well all the nasty things, vet trips, medication etc)

But the following week we are supposed to be going to see my Mother in Law for 3 nights (she lives in Devon we're in Essex). Now when we're away we have a fantastic cat sitter she knows the boys and I trust her completely, but given how things have been with Jess I'm not sure about leaving him for 3 nights so soon after him having blocked, (will be about a month providing nothing happens between now and then)

When I broached the subject with Hubby about him going alone he wasn't that impressed and thinks I'll upset MIL.

But I don't know what to do, I feel if I go I'll spend the whole time worrying about Jess and whether his weeing, but then if I don't know I'm going to upset hubby and MIL plus lose £60 on train tickets we've already brought.

Any thoughs anyone and sorry if I've posted this in the wrong place.