Author Topic: Situation vacant - stroker required  (Read 1939 times)

Offline fluffybunny

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Re: Situation vacant - stroker required
« Reply #9 on: December 29, 2009, 23:02:01 PM »
Nooooooooooooooo

[donkey] pick meeee, pick meeeeeeeeee! [/donkey]

Offline Janeyk

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Re: Situation vacant - stroker required
« Reply #8 on: December 29, 2009, 18:27:15 PM »
I'll offer my services please, I can fulfil all those duties and more I'll come complete with Webbox, Dreamies or any other treats preferred  ;D purrs are definitely a bonus one of my kitties doesn't do much purring  :(
Please consider the harder to home cats in rescue.

Offline fluffybunny

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Re: Situation vacant - stroker required
« Reply #7 on: December 29, 2009, 16:42:45 PM »
Anyone feel up to the task?  You will be paid in very loud purrs. 

Oooh!  Ooooh!  Me mememememememeemeeee.  I have 2 years experience of a demanding ginger and am proficient at stroking while using the laptop, cooking the dinner and sleeping.  I'm not sure whether Abbey would accept very loud purrs in lieu of mortgage payments though - what do you reckon?
« Last Edit: December 29, 2009, 16:43:32 PM by fluffybunny »

Offline Susanne (urbantigers)

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Re: Situation vacant - stroker required
« Reply #6 on: December 29, 2009, 16:13:42 PM »
Jaffa says he would like to personally interview all candidates.

Offline Kirst

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Re: Situation vacant - stroker required
« Reply #5 on: December 29, 2009, 15:19:06 PM »
You know that is just the sort of job I would love! :Luv2: :Luv2:



Offline Gill (sneakiefeline)

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Re: Situation vacant - stroker required
« Reply #4 on: December 29, 2009, 12:39:43 PM »
I think Spice surpasses Franta as he accepted, no demanded cuddles from my bro when he was here on Boxing day and I just wasnt good enough.

Mind you he was well miffed when ejected from my bros lap cos he wanted to do something else.......sigh.....just not a dedicated stroker!

Offline harlequin

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Re: Situation vacant - stroker required
« Reply #3 on: December 29, 2009, 12:17:31 PM »
I don't think a full-time stroker would be enough for Spice. He even rejects cuddles and kisses from the other half because he only wants cuddles from me! I've had the last five days off work for Chrsitmas, so Spice's attention-seeking went into overdrive. Every morning we had a lie-in together, so Spice could sleep under the duvet with me for a bit, then he'd stand on my chest in a bid to suffocate me so that I had to get up and feed him breakfast. Then he sat outside the bathroom door and howled while I was in the shower, and I ended up letting him into the bathroom while I was on the toilet! :Crazy: Then he spent the rest of the day following me about while I did various jobs around the house, launched himself onto my lap every time my backside grazed the sofa, and sat in the sink staring at me while I cooked Christmas dinner. This has gone on for five days until this morning when I got dressed and had to go back to work - Spice was mortified! When I left the house, he was firmly ignoring me and staring very hard at the wall - I think I'm for it when I get home! :evillaugh:

Offline Gill (sneakiefeline)

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Re: Situation vacant - stroker required
« Reply #2 on: December 29, 2009, 12:00:46 PM »
Franta says he wants one too but doesnt purr very often  ;D

Offline Susanne (urbantigers)

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Situation vacant - stroker required
« Reply #1 on: December 29, 2009, 10:13:58 AM »
It's become clear to me that Jaffa requires 24 hour cuddles.  Having me at home all day has been bliss for him as he just wants to be stroked around the clock.  No need to stop when he sleeps or eats - he requires me to just carry on stroking!  So I've decided the only solution is to employ a full time stroker for when I'm out at work.  Any takers?

Main duties:  head strokes with emphasis on cheeks and chin, punctuated by regular kisses between the ears.   full body strokes from head to tail with a gentle tug on the tail to finish.  Lap strokes - sits on lap leaning against stroker so that stroker can stroke side farthest away and kiss him on the head at the same time.  As you become more familiar to him, tummy kisses will be required.

Anyone feel up to the task?  You will be paid in very loud purrs. 

Please apply in writing.

 


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