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Author Topic: Dog Diary vs Cat Diary  (Read 4337 times)

Offline clarenmax

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Re: Dog Diary vs Cat Diary
« Reply #11 on: November 20, 2006, 15:26:23 PM »
Lol the diary is brilliant!  I agree that you should never underestimate a cat - they are clever little beggers and know just what to do to wrap you around their paws.  Don't mess with them LOL :evillaugh:
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Offline Roz

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Re: Dog Diary vs Cat Diary
« Reply #10 on: November 20, 2006, 14:56:55 PM »
You can probably hear me chuckling from here.
I just love the dog diary.....soooo true. Lovable half-wits.? As my hubby says, a brain half the size of a pea. ;D
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Offline ems

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Re: Dog Diary vs Cat Diary
« Reply #9 on: November 20, 2006, 14:37:31 PM »
LOL I love that!  :rofl:

So, so true.

I was only saying to my OH last night that after i had told Nina off for eating Kiki's food she was sitting on the window sill quietly plotting our downfall!  :evillaugh:
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Offline Gill (sneakiefeline)

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Re: Dog Diary vs Cat Diary
« Reply #8 on: November 20, 2006, 12:48:36 PM »
Cats are the smartest and sneakiest by far...........have had Misa chatting for about an hour while he chased something round the floor.........just hope he caught it cos I dont like em. Ducha has been licking my legs and head butting them and now has gone into food room to meow for attention.....................anything to stop me doing want I want  :rofl:

They always come first now gonna have to rushhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh and find out if Ducha OK..................yes alright I know he is but........... :rofl:  just need to check!
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Offline Sue P (Paddysmum)

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Re: Dog Diary vs Cat Diary
« Reply #7 on: November 20, 2006, 12:30:17 PM »
Cats always have the last laugh and the upper hand.

Was doing some ironing in the bedroom at the weekend, and I could hear Paddy calling.

I pushed open the door to the bathroom, and there he was, sitting in the bath chatting away.   Tess appeared in the doorway behind me and peeped over the side of the bath.  Pad ducked down then "biff biff biff!"  The old hooky paw came out and caught Tess squarely on the nose.  Tess looked at me and then went back to the bath and had another look - "biff biff thwack!"  Three times she got caught.

She left the bathroom with a really daft grin on her face and a gently wagging tail.  Pad remained in the bath looking very smug!
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Offline Sam (Fussy_Furball)

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Re: Dog Diary vs Cat Diary
« Reply #6 on: November 20, 2006, 11:54:42 AM »
Nick NEVER underestimate a cat.? Having lived with "foreigns" for many years I have learnt that very few cats are as stupid as they'll have you believe.? I can remember watching our Siamese actually plotting how to get onto the bird table.? You could see him planning the route he would use then up he got and tried it out! Amazing, very naughty, but still amazing.
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Offline Catwhisperer

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Re: Dog Diary vs Cat Diary
« Reply #5 on: November 20, 2006, 11:52:07 AM »
 :evillaugh:

Love It Claire !!!!!
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Offline Nick (Peanut & Boo)

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Re: Dog Diary vs Cat Diary
« Reply #4 on: November 20, 2006, 11:49:55 AM »
that made me larf  :rofl:

That is our Dobie to a tee  she is as thick as 2 short planks and if her brain isn't in her bottom it must be in her belly. I'd sooner try to train a dustbin  :-:

Wheras both the cats are wily and sneakie and clever their memory is amazing and I sometimes wonder if they are brighter than we give them credit for.
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Offline hannah (weeny)

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Re: Dog Diary vs Cat Diary
« Reply #3 on: November 20, 2006, 11:44:00 AM »
oh that does make me laugh.  sometimes you look at kits and can almost see them thinking all that!!!!!!!!!
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Offline Sam (Fussy_Furball)

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Re: Dog Diary vs Cat Diary
« Reply #2 on: November 20, 2006, 11:43:08 AM »
Fabulous!
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Offline Claire

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Dog Diary vs Cat Diary
« Reply #1 on: November 20, 2006, 11:39:57 AM »
This joke always makes me smile so thought I would share!? I am sure a lot of you have seen it before so sorry if that's the case.? We have a Dog, two cats and a Budgie so some small parts of it ring true!?
Please no-one take offence.? ?I am well aware cats and dogs don't really think like that and that all the cats on here love their slaves very much its just a joke with enough of an element of truth to make it funny!!



Dog Diary vs Cat Diary

EXCERPTS FROM A DOG'S DIARY

Day number 180

8:00 am - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVORITE!
9:30 am - OH BOY! A CAR RIDE! MY FAVORITE!
9:40 am - OH BOY! A WALK! MY FAVORITE!
10:30 am - OH BOY! A CAR RIDE! MY FAVORITE!
11:30 am - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVORITE!
12:00 noon - OH BOY! THE KIDS! MY FAVORITE!
1:00 pm OH BOY! THE GARDEN! MY FAVORITE!
4:00 pm - OH BOY! THE KIDS! MY FAVORITE!
5:00 PM - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVORITE!
5:30 PM - OH BOY! MOM! MY FAVORITE!

Day number 181

8:00 am - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVORITE!
9:30 am - OH BOY! A CAR RIDE! MY FAVORITE!
9:40 am - OH BOY! A WALK! MY FAVORITE!
10:30 am - OH BOY! A CAR RIDE! MY FAVORITE!
11:30 am - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVORITE!
12:00 noon - OH BOY! THE KIDS! MY FAVORITE!
1:00 pm OH BOY! THE GARDEN! MY FAVORITE!
4:00 pm - OH BOY! THE KIDS! MY FAVORITE!
5:00 PM - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVORITE!
5:30 PM - OH BOY! MOM! MY FAVORITE!

Day number 182

8:00 am - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVORITE!
9:30 am - OH BOY! A CAR RIDE! MY FAVORITE!
9:40 am - OH BOY! A WALK! MY FAVORITE!
10:30 am - OH BOY! A CAR RIDE! MY FAVORITE!
11:30 am - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVORITE!
12:00 noon - OH BOY! THE KIDS! MY FAVORITE!
1:00 pm OH BOY! THE GARDEN! MY FAVORITE!
4:00 pm - OH BOY! THE KIDS! MY FAVORITE!
5:00 PM - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVORITE!
5:30 PM - OH BOY! MOM! MY FAVORITE!


EXCERPTS FROM A CAT'S DIARY

DAY 752

My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects. They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while I am forced to eat dry cereal. The only thing that keeps me going is the hope of escape, and the mild satisfaction I get from ruining the occasional piece of furniture. Tomorrow I may eat another houseplant.

DAY 761

Today my attempt to kill my captors by weaving around their feet while they were walking almost succeeded, must try this at the top of the stairs. In an attempt to disgust and repulse these vile oppressors, I once again induced myself to vomit on their favorite chair...must try this on their bed.

DAY 765

Decapitated a mouse and brought them the headless body, in attempt to make them aware of what I am capable of, and to try to strike fear into their hearts. They only cooed and condescended about what a good little cat I was...Hmmm. Not working according to plan.

DAY 768

I am finally aware of how sadistic they are. For no good reason I was chosen for the water torture. This time however it included a burning foamy chemical called "shampoo." What sick minds could invent such a liquid?! My only consolation is the piece of thumb still stuck between my teeth.

DAY 771

There was some sort of gathering of their accomplices. I was placed in solitary throughout the event. However, I could hear the noise and smell the foul odor of the glass tubes they call "beer.." More importantly I overheard that my confinement was due to MY power of "allergies." Must learn what this is and how to use it to my advantage.

DAY 774

I am convinced the other captives are flunkies and maybe snitches. The dog is routinely released and seems more than happy to return. He is obviously a half-wit. The bird on the other hand has got to be an informant, and speaks with them regularly. I am certain he reports my every move. Due to his current placement in the metal room his safety is assured.

But I can wait, it is only a matter of time...
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Claire
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