Topic: I want my baby boy back (Read 4569 times)

Wibblechick · « **Reply #29 on:** March 07, 2009, 18:40:53 PM »

Thre is a little area of our kitchen window that is really filthy.

If you saw it, you would be horrified and think I was a dirty so and so.

Then if you looked more closely, you might see that there are little cat footprints there. . . .

They were made by "teenage-cat, Perseus. At the time I was cross with him for making the marks, but amused too.

I meant to wipe them off, but later that day he went missing ....... He was the victim of a hit and run.

Perseus died nearly 5 years ago .......

The pawprints will stay.

Janeyk · « **Reply #28 on:** March 07, 2009, 18:31:31 PM »

I'm going through the same right now so I know how you feel xx

woodlandcats · « **Reply #27 on:** March 07, 2009, 17:35:04 PM »

Lost quite a lot of cats over the years, for different reasons.
Still, the love of my life cat, Ferris, died in a car accident August 2008, now today, I still can't look at his pictures without being devastated once again.
I want his pic as a tattoo but I can't get myself to create it?
I'm always thinking : "why, why on earth Ferris??"
I also want a magic wand to undo those months and I still can't believe he's gone.
Takes a lot of time and courage.

Debsymiller (Rufus' mum) · « **Reply #26 on:** March 07, 2009, 17:29:15 PM »

Quote from: maryas on March 07, 2009, 16:17:21 PM

Wow - your new cat has the same D.O.B - that's amazing - something going on there I am sure.

He's a bunny but even so, it is a strange coincedence!

Topsy Turvey · « **Reply #25 on:** March 07, 2009, 16:32:49 PM »

Quote from: maryas on March 07, 2009, 16:17:21 PM

We've all had the 'just a cat' argument i am sure.

It really

me off when people say that. I got it when Sasha had to be pts. The only person who understood was my really really really grumpy ex boss who is a big animal fan. The only time we ever got on!!

maryas · « **Reply #24 on:** March 07, 2009, 16:17:21 PM »

We've all had the 'just a cat' argument i am sure. I have fallen out with family over this and will never forget how they hurt me.

It's nice that you can laugh about things you did together and when you see things it's good to cry but try and have lots of laughs.

Wow - your new cat has the same D.O.B - that's amazing - something going on there I am sure.

We have to rmember that our cats might have had a really nasty life without us, so no matter how short their time with us - they were happy and loved and we can't forget that.

Mary

Angeladeedah · « **Reply #23 on:** March 07, 2009, 13:36:16 PM »

I have yet to lose any of my cats and so can only imagine what you must be going through. But I do know how devastated I would be to lose them - like you, they are my babies. I have no children - they are my children. My thoughts are with you at this difficult time.

Debsymiller (Rufus' mum) · « **Reply #22 on:** March 07, 2009, 12:55:29 PM »

Thanks guys, it really is appreciated. It is definitely a comfort to have yous guys around and I know you understand. Most people dont and this is defintely the hardest bereavement I have experienced, human or animal. Cause he was a cat though, I am expected to be 'over it'. I don't expect I will ever be 'over it' but I know it will get easier in time. All this is part of the natural grieving process- doesn't make it any easier though! I am sure I will still miss him, even in my old age. I look at Oscar and Jasper and wonder what they think. I am sure Oscar must miss his washes and cuddling up which were reserved only for Rufus and I am sure Jasper misses his rough and tumbles, he does play fight iwth Oscar but he's just not rough enough for Jasper! lol.
I just feel like part of me is missing but am so thankful to have had that love for at least a short time. I always imagined having him in his old age and then this is such a shock. I was an absolute wreck the first week, then have had 2 weeks where I have been ok and now we'r 3-4 weeks down the line I think the realisation that he really isn't coming home has set in. Everything's so final.
My new rescue bunny Vince who arrived last week, well they told me he was exactly 9 months- the lady had given the DOB when she signed him over and he has exactly the same DOB as Rufus. I wonder if iut's coincedence or a little sign from my boy. I will never know but maybe it is a sign to let me know he's safe.
It's little things that set me off- like yesterday when I was filing the bunnies vaccination cards as they all had their jabs yesterday, I found Rufus' card. I will always keep it, I don't think I could ever throw it away but there are little things of him everywhere (Not least the permant muddy footprints on our sofa which meant we had to get throws!

) sometimes these things amke me smile but often they set me off.

Topsy Turvey · « **Reply #21 on:** March 07, 2009, 11:16:24 AM »

Its awful, isn't it.

I still miss my Sasha who went to the bridge two and a half years ago. My hubby and I talk about her regularly and it does help.

:hug:to you all x

Bonkers Mad!!! · « **Reply #20 on:** March 07, 2009, 08:45:05 AM »

i feel exactly the same way about my ovis. even though it's been 5 years and other cats have come and gone. the only way i can deal with it is to just not think about him. i love the others dearly but none have come close to the special bond i had with my little man. now there is Mouse and the strength of my love for him scares me.

swampmaxmum · « **Reply #19 on:** March 07, 2009, 08:19:58 AM »

just wanted to send you a big hug

lots of big hugs

one of the hardest parts of grieving for a furry love of your life is that not that many people you have to deal with everyday understand, in the way they would if you'd lost a human loved one. At least on Purrs, people understand how hard it is. I hope you can get a little bit of comfort from being on here, I know nothing will ease the pain of Rufus's loss for quite some time yet. xxx

Bazsmum · « **Reply #18 on:** March 07, 2009, 03:36:48 AM »

Wish I had a magic wand!

Kirst · « **Reply #17 on:** March 06, 2009, 23:13:50 PM »

I am exactly the same , I still miss Oscar terribly and wish it could have been different. Him and Beavis were inseperable and they were meant to grow old together.

Gill (sneakiefeline) · « **Reply #16 on:** March 06, 2009, 23:08:15 PM »

you definately not an idiot jude

Judecat (Paula) · « **Reply #15 on:** March 06, 2009, 23:07:04 PM »

Hey Hun. We are here for you. I know I am an idiot, but sometimes I still 'feel' Mogwai, Troubles Mum still rubbing against me. I know rthis isn't the case but I do believe that the animals we love never truly leave us, as long as they remain in our memories

2d · « **Reply #14 on:** March 06, 2009, 22:54:28 PM »

I feel exactly as you do.

It's 7 weeks today that Edward died, and there hasn't been a single day I haven't missed him with all my heart.

I'm sure it will lessen over time, but so far it really hasn't.

maryas · « **Reply #13 on:** March 06, 2009, 21:20:01 PM »

It's ok to be sad today and then happy tomorrow - we all inderstand and I lost my Smudge last April and I still cry now and agian and I certainly think of him every day. Even though I've got Bonnie and all the Purrs gang I still feel I need him but can't have him and it feels so unfair.

Mary

Kay and Penny · « **Reply #12 on:** March 06, 2009, 21:16:55 PM »

I can't imagine how I would cope if one of mine went missing

no chance of getting over it if you think you keep seeing them or hearing them, as I'm sure you must do

bonnielass · « **Reply #11 on:** March 06, 2009, 21:02:54 PM »

I know exactly how you feel

i miss my little Ninja and still look for him when i come home from work as he always used to wait at the gate for me to come home and my missing babe Wizzy, its almost a year now since he disappeared but i still hurt and miss him like hell

the pain somtimes is all consuming and really makes you feel wretched

JackSpratt · « **Reply #10 on:** March 06, 2009, 20:45:34 PM »

Quote from: Gillian (Ambercat) on March 06, 2009, 20:01:20 PM

I find it comes in waves - you think you are coping ok and life is going on as normal, then it hits you.

That's what happens with me.

Kay and Penny · « **Reply #9 on:** March 06, 2009, 20:22:29 PM »

I only really felt reconciled to the loss of my Siamese Tum-Tum when enough years had passed to make it impossible that she could still have been alive

it's like a wound which is raw and bleeding at first, but it gradually forms a scab - that scab gets knocked off occasionally and you have to start the healing process again, but it a new scab forms more quickly and eventually you just have a scar left where the wound was - but the scar never leaves you, however much it fades

Susanne (urbantigers) · « **Reply #8 on:** March 06, 2009, 20:08:29 PM »

I still have moments when I wish my little Magpie was with me, even though it's been over 3 years since he went to the bridge and I now have that little ~~horror~~ darling called Mosi. It's normal and it's the price we pay for loving them so much.

Liz · « **Reply #7 on:** March 06, 2009, 20:07:27 PM »

Its the hardest thing to get over the pain but time does diminish it but they are never far from your thoughts

When I lost my first bridge babe Toerag to an RTA I thought I would never get over it and his siter Sweetie is a constant reminder she will be 17 in April and he was only 7 when the bridge called and each one who has joined their brother - the cats Haggis, Moose, Hissy Holly, Bertie, Miss gracie, Gem and her babies Star, Cairo and Shanghai, and most recently our darling Tiger Toerags brother in december he died in my arms at the vet for no apparent reason and my Dog Breeze, each one has taken part of my heart some had years others months and a few days but each one is thought of most days and what I would give for one more day, one more purr, hiss and bark from each and everyone of them is priceless.

I also have 3 on a mission without permission - Bandit, Salem and Rio and have no closure on them but still have them registered as missing with their ID Chip folks and would welcome them all paws back with open arms

So I take comfort in the current Clan Members and have my photo gallery of my Bridge kids and my missing boys and each of my bridge kids has a special flower in their garden of remembrance as we have lost so many all at different times and when their bulb or plant springs through I know they are putting in their annual appearance to remind us that they are still with us just not in our daily lives

Gillian Harvey · « **Reply #6 on:** March 06, 2009, 20:01:20 PM »

I understand that hurt and that need to just hold them again.

I find it comes in waves - you think you are coping ok and life is going on as normal, then it hits you.

Maddiesmum · « **Reply #5 on:** March 06, 2009, 19:53:55 PM »

Bless you I am sorry you are hurting like this. The only thing that will help is time and I know it doesn't feel like it will but believe me it does. You will never stop loving Rufus and missing him but the pain will not be as intense

Gill (sneakiefeline) · « **Reply #4 on:** March 06, 2009, 19:44:16 PM »

I understand so much how you feel and nothing can take the pain away, it just slowly diminishes with lots of time but for me its still there even 4 yrs in the summer from Kocka going to the bridge.

You can rant all you want cos we all understand and sometimes talking is the only way of dealing with it.

I found the only way I could cope was to write down what I was feeling when I felt very bad and I have all the stuff I wrote about me and Kocka and also what I wrote about Franta when he was so ill 3 weeks ago.

We are all here for you to cry on our shoulders

fluffybunny · « **Reply #3 on:** March 06, 2009, 19:38:53 PM »

I can't say anything that will help with your hurt, all I can do is give you lots of

Over time your pain will turn into memories, but for now you take care of yourself and allow yourself the time to grieve the loss of your beloved boy xxx

JackSpratt · « **Reply #2 on:** March 06, 2009, 19:14:43 PM »

I think we all feel like that from time to time about cats we've lost. I know I regularly get pangs of missing Toby(my Little Junkie); he had the most adorable temperament and was such an amazing little guy.

Debsymiller (Rufus' mum) · « **Reply #1 on:** March 06, 2009, 19:07:49 PM »

Just feeling so low tonight. I am really struggling to cope with Rufus' death and I just want him in my arms again. He was the love of my life and I can't believe it's been over three weeks since he was here.
This is easily the hardest thing I have ever had to deal with. I miss him soooo much. I miss his little paws on my chest in the morning, his kisses on my cheeks, his soft fur, his purr and the way him and I connected. There was pure love between us and when I looked at him my heart would melt. Even when he was such a little pickle he could always make me smile.
I have no idea how I will ever get used to him not being here- my heart is completely broken. I keep trying to keep on and keep going but everyday this hurts so much. I just can't make sense of it.
Sorry, to be so emotional but I just want him back and I know that can't be.

Author Topic: I want my baby boy back (Read 4569 times)