My new kitten won't go to the toilet!

[Cheesecat]

Cheesecat - i love your tortie 

Awww thanks - thats Gerti - I feel like a proud mum being told they have a lovely child.. 
I will tell her you think she is pretty  haha

[fleur]

I have two indoor cats in a one bedroom flat, they are perfectly happy and have never tried to escape. Both are male, siamese crosses. Sadly for me they tend to be more affectionate during the morning and day while I am at work, come evening they become more interested in wrestling each other and jumping about like loonies! So it might just work out better for you with one in that respect. I know you have said so many times already that you can't have two, but really, your kitten sounds to me like she is very lonely. So many kittens are born into care so you know their full background from birth, that should never deter you.  The cost of feeding another cat when you feed high quality food is negligible because you need to feed so little of it, and changing the littertray might happen marginally more often but with clumping stuff, not reallyThis is just FYI not trying to talk you into anything. You should get a cuddly toy for her to snuggle with while she is still missing her littermates. I'm sure she'll forget in time though, so don't worry too much.

[kittykat]

I would love to get another kitten for her but its not that easy.  We chose her very carefully, her breed etc to give the best chance of her being happy as an indoor cat.  Shes a bsh.  She wasn't cheap at all and we saved up to get her (but worth every penny) We couldn't afford the expense of  2.  And I know there are kittens from shops and rescues which are cheaper but i wouldn't want to just buy any other kitten without knowing its background etc.  My friend has a moggie who's a housecat.  He's never been outside yet he hates being indoors.

We also only live in a 2 bed flat. 

I know it would be much kinder to her and in an ideal world we would do it, but its just not a good idea for us right now.  Rest assure, she does get plenty and plenty of love and play from us.  I know shes much more playful now because shes a kitten but as she gets older i'm sure she'll happily sleep during the day and use her energy with us in the mornings and evenings.

I hope so.  I do want her to be happy.

[Michelle (furbabystar)]

My sister has a 1 year old cat.  We live in the same village.  Do you think i should introduce her to him?  Or should i wait until they're older?

I thought maybe a cat friend coming round on some days might help her when shes older.  But i don't know how well cats get along.

It doesn't work like that. You kitten would need another kitten/cat to live with her 24/7. 
Cat are territorial it wouldn't work having a cat "popping round"

Whats your kittens name ? you havent told us
What colour, how old ??
any pics ??

[Beth (Mouse's Mum)]

introducing kittens is much easier than introducing cats in my experience, and i would never have got a new cat or kitten on it's own without it having company. 

Having 2 cats is so much easier than having 1, they're not so dependent on you and don't crave your attention so much if they have a friend to play with.

Why will your husband not allow 2 cats if they're easier than 1?  It's much much kinder for them to have someone to love too

[kittykat]

My sister has a 1 year old cat.  We live in the same village.  Do you think i should introduce her to him?  Or should i wait until they're older?

I thought maybe a cat friend coming round on some days might help her when shes older.  But i don't know how well cats get along.

[Michelle (furbabystar)]

Cheesecat - i love your tortie 

[Michelle (furbabystar)]

I can quiet understand your worry about the neighbour - try and keep "in" with her, be really friendly, make jokes about it or buy her a packets of fags, bottle of wine or flowers lol
Just try and keep the peace if she is likely to make a problem of it.

Some more things i have thought of -
Try and wear her out at night (the kitten not the neighbour lol) get her loads of toys and play with her so that hopefully she will sleep better.
When you go back to work next week leave a radio or TV on so she has voices and not just a quiet house.

I still agree with Cheesecat though - try and work on Hubby to get a playmate !

[Cheesecat]

Even though you said its not an option, company seems like the best thing.

Cheese was always a bit sad being left during the day - she just slept by the door waiting for me or my bf to come in, she would tell us off too! Now we have Gerti she seems like a much happier cat, she still moans at us for leaving her, but she is happier to have someone to play and cuddle up with  

[kittykat]

You lose all dignity when you find yourself scratching in a litter box pretending to be a cat!    My husband thought i'd gone barmy (although now i can threaten him with replacing him with a second kitty so he may then be more sympthetic! lol)

I will try to do tough love tonight.  The problem is she doesn't meow......shes screams!  For such a tiny little kitten, she sure has a pair of lungs on her.

I've already had a horrid neighbour knocking to complain ( i live in apartments and this horrid old lady has already got a dog evicted for 'nuisance noise' so i'm really scared she'll try the same here).  So i'm scared to let her scream at 3 in the morning.

But i guess i have to risk it if shes got to get used to it. 

[Michelle (furbabystar)]

  Visions of you scratching in the litter tray 

As for the sleeping on the sofa with her and playing half the night - Think some tough love is needed here or you might not be able to break the habit !!  Kittens are alot like children,  they play up and are quick learners to what they can get away with  !

Is she allowed to sleep on your bed ? It might be better to let her come up to bed with you but when she wants to play in the night you will have to be strong and not give in - she will get the hang on it and learn that bedtime is bedtime (we have all been there believe me lol)

Shame Hubby wouldnt give in to letting her have a friend - Could you not say that the vet has suggested it ??
Failing that get rid of the Hubby 

[Susanne (urbantigers)]

Keep an eye on her but it's not uncommon for cats to hold on for a long time when they're in a new place.  When I took Jaffa up to my mum's xmas 2005 waiting for Jaffa to poo became a family joke!

[kittykat]

Thanks for your reply Michelle.

She was going to the toilet with no problems at the breeders.  Its just been since she got here.  Obviously shes scared.  But i don't know how to reassure her.  I keep scratching at it myself to show her what it is.  And keep putting her init, but shes screams and jumps straight out.

I slept on the sofa with her last night.  We sleep for an hour then she woke her crying so we'd have a play for an hour.....then sleep for an hour....then play etc (so i'm rather shattered today).  She purred so much when i was stroking her last night so i felt she really bonded with me.  And this morning she woke me up by giving me a morning wash with her tongue.  It was so adorable!   

But then as soon as we got up, she ran from me again and won't let me pick her up. 

She'll happily play with me.  But then when i stop she cries.

I know this is all natural as she's only a baby.  I'm just concerned about the toilet issue.

I will try leaving her for a bit longer each day this week to see if she gets used to it.

ps.  I would love to get her a friend but my husband is not going to give in to that!

[Michelle (furbabystar)]

I would keep an eye on her, it might be that she has been to the loo somewhere else !
If however you are sure that she hasnt been to the toilet in another 24hrs i would pop her along to your vets.

It is usual for her to cry when you leave the room, she has come away from her Mum and siblings so it is all very new to her. As she is an "only kitten" now it might be a good idea to start leaving her a little time each day so she gets used to being on her own all day next week when you return to work  (or you could go and get her a friend ??!!!!!)

[kittykat]

Shes been with us 24 hours now and still hasn't been a wee or poo.  I try to put her in the litter (especially after shes eaten) but she screams and runs straight out.  Its just a tray with wood pellets (same as she had at her breeders)

I'm really worried she might get ill if she doesn't go soon.  Do some cats hold it for this long?

Also she still cries everytime i leave the room.  I'm off work all this week, but i return next week and need her to be used to her own company by then without screaming.

We only got her yesterday morning.  Am i expecting too much too soon?